Private Property

Explanation

2012-01-22T00:41:00.001+08:00

Honestly, my last post is due to my sort of emo mix with hormone imbalance. I was very unstable that few days. Believe or not, I was actually cured by 3 of my form 3 juniors. I sincerely love my juniors. Well here goes my explanations.

I was PMSing that few days. Plus, when I do meetings with my form 5 librarians, they always either make the "you owe me money" or "can you finish faster" face. I felt like everyone hated me, they don't want to do anything for me. Ah, just feel like nobody gives a damn about it. I know that people won't naturally understand what I am thinking or doing, because I am in my position. Anyway, I'm quite over that period.

Then, I got an Interact Club thingy. We had a meeting for IU day planning then I feel like it's hard to get sponsorship with what we have in mind now, so I tried to tell them, but then all I get is "we hope for the best" and the fed-up face. I felt like everyone hated me. Whatever la. Love me or hate me, your call, I no longer care.

Then I feel like even when I put on a long face, nobody bother to ask me what's wrong. So I felt unimportant la. Like nobody gives a damn even if I'm angry or in a bad mood or something. I just need someone to tell me don't worry I'll listen if you want to say anything. A lot of times girls only need someone to agree on what they have made decision, that's why they kept going on and on about something.

OK, I'm so in a Chinese New Year mood, so HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR EVERYONE!

Super Bad Mood

2012-01-18T00:02:00.001+08:00

I'm sick. Constant headache. Tons of homework. People beh song me at library and interact. I just feel like crying. Nobody understand what I mean. Nobody knows how hard I work for things to be done. I'm so stressed out. Sorry, I'll explain properly in my next post, most probably on this weekend. I'm far too stuck in my state of mind that I can't explain anything..

Happy New Year!

2012-01-03T01:22:00.000+08:00

So, it's 2012! End of the world, eh? How many of you really believe 2012 is really the end of the world? I don't. Anyway, it's going to be a badass year, no matter the world is at its end or not. It's SPM year. I'm so going to change my routine this year. Shorter sleep - I sleep a damn too much. Study on weekends - I'm determine to make use of my weekend this year. Oh, I'm off topic, sorry!

Anyway, guys. Have a super duper happy 2012! I'm so in the mood to go to school and nail the work now. I need to retrain my brain. It's in super sluggish mood. Going to school from tomorrow onwards. It's not school day tomorrow, but form 2,3 and 5 had to go back to get our new text book. I'm a committee of the SPBT, so it's working day tomorrow.

Although this year is SPM and I might be stopping my urge to online and facebook for the rest of the evening, but I promise that I will keep you guys update!

Here's To You, Sister Cheng~

2011-12-30T02:45:00.001+08:00

Uh, 30th already? It means.... It's Friday, Friday~~ Haha, just kidding. Ok, it means the year is at its end. It's time to review the year. As a reply to my sister Cheng's blog post, lets start with reviewing 2011's resolution.

2011 New Year Resolution:

#1 Make full use of my planner.

~I guess? I did for the first half of the year, but the other half..... XD

#2 Make my Biology as strong as a 1000-year-old tree!

~I did, excluding the last 4 chapters as I didn't do any notes, nor did I listen when teacher's explaining for the 8th times.

#3 Be more active in co-curriculum, class activities and library activities.

~Library? Yeah, of course. Others? Nah~

#4 Smile even more and be friendly.

~This is definitely yes! I dare to say that I am a more cheerful and optimistic person this year end. And I'm also more calm. =)

#5 Practice proactive and win-win.

~This, I don't know how to say. Yes?

#6 Don't whine during duties.

~Yes, I don't whine anymore!

#7 Eat better and healthier and less. =)

~..................

#8 Try to drink 2 liters of water per day.

~Nope.

#9 Get involve more in the coming IU day.

~Nope as there weren't any IU day.

#10 Be more helpful wherever I am.

~I'm sorry, I'm not a good kid! T.T

#11 Do more random good acts/deeds.

~This is just random. I didn't even have the chance to do any!

#12 Be nothing less.

~YES!

OK! Now, like news, what are top 5 events of my life this year? Seriously, I'm in holiday for too long, I feel like I've been stuck in a time zone for too long, I can't remember what happened this year.

Top #1 : 4 Science 1 class drama. It took a lot of time and effort, not to mention a lot of "real" dramas too. So it's quite memorable.

Top #2 : Japanese tour day! Most happening event in SMK Cheras this year. I love seeing everyone in special outfits~

Top #3 : Science exhibition. I spent the whole day explaining the process of making soap and dyeing someone's hand pink until my throat sores. But it was nice. First time I ever see dissected frogs and mini-baby rats.

Top #4 : PPS Pelantikan 2011. The day I feel proudest in my life.

Top #5 : 4 Science 1 outing! Ice skate~ First time I plan for outing that involves so many people. And it was fun too!

I'm sorry my dear Tan family members that you guys weren't in the Top 5 events since I can't really tell one from another. Lastly, I would wish for a blissful and wonderful year of 2012. No end of the world! And a wonderful result for my SPM! Cheers~

Merry Christmas!

2011-12-20T23:47:00.001+08:00

Christmas is right around the corner, so HAPPY CHRISTMAS! I'm not going to be going through any 'secret santa', a thing exposed to me only this year. I didn't know such thing existed until Yen suggested that we buy gifts for each other, which don't sound so attractive to me. I never did like spending money on others when I barely buy things that I want for myself (except for that Elianto nail-polish-s). Well, I like watching my bank book grow!

Anyway, if any of you still up for the Secret Santa thingy, let me know, ok? I'll be joining you guys, despite what I just said above. I might end up liking it, maybe? Confirm with us, Yen.

Christmas is right around the corner, meaning 2011 is about to end, meaning holiday is about to end too, meaning I will be starting my form 5 soon. In the end, all I wanted to say is, I didn't do my notes. Sorry! XD Can anyone tell me, where can I buy text books? The problem with SPBT is we can't keep the book to study, especially when SPM is coming. And we can't buy text books from book stores like Popular.

Anyway, guys, dengan ikhlasnya, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! I wish all the form 5 next year ( including myself) good luck for SPM year!

Everyone Has Histories Unimaginable To Others

2011-12-14T19:10:00.001+08:00

This post might sound like I'm stalking on my senior because I got my inspiration from his blog post. It's just that I have things to say about it. =) My senior was the best student in his year, therefore naturally names like "genius" and so will be given. Lets just say that nobody likes to be labelled. Even it's a compliment.

Turns out, he had quite a bad childhood during primary school. Who would have thought? He seems like those who are always boosted with confidence. Outcast, not much friends, normal academic level. It's just a whole different person than the person he is now.

He kinda had the same story as I do, just that mine wasn't as bad as his. Nor turns out as good as he did. =) I wasn't really the kid that always get surrounded by friends or the one with the best result. I'm kinda stuck halfway in between. I was good in sport but never the best and the one who got any special attention, good in academic but same thing, wasn't good in talking and socializing. Even now, when I talk to my primary school friends, I shrink back to the old shy me. Not to mention, I was pretty low in confidence when I'm in primary school because I was constantly tease by friends that I am fat or something like that.

When I went into secondary school, I started to grow out of my shell and learn to have fun. If I didn't tell any of my current friends of my history, I wonder will they ever tell. However, I'm thankful that I wasn't that popular or something during primary school, or I might end up as a stuck-up and over-confident kid who take things for granted.

Therefore, treat everyone kindly. You'll never know if you have hurt them by accident. And it's never to late to grow out of our own shell and live the way you want to life. People always regret things that they never get to do rather than things they did. Lastly, don't ever treat anyone as an outcast.

" Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal."
- Albert Camus -

Things That I Must Do

2011-11-29T19:42:00.001+08:00

I better write it down before I forget. These are things that I have to do. For all kinds of reason.

1) Work part-time in a veterinary clinic
2) Volunteer at SPCA/ Zoo Negara
3) Go education fair
4) Phone up for enquiry about international scholarship
5) Write an 5000 words long essay and pass up to my English teacher for evaluation
6) Practice going for an interview
7) Tidy up the room
8) Go outing with primary school friends
9) Go outing with secondary school friends

However, all of them are planned for after SPM, except for number 5. Things I must do this holiday.

1) Complete Biology notes
2) Complete Chemistry notes
3) Complete History notes
4) Complete Moral reports and essays
5) Complete Homemade notebook
6) Get ready librarian board stuff for next year

None of it are close to done. Things I must do next year.

1) Work hard! Get great results!
2) Make full use of study groups: give motivation, provide exercises, initiate discussions!
3) Complete ALL notes!
4) Reach target of Librarian board!
5) Get PIBG support for librarian board!
6) Make an awesome kursus asas day for librarian!
7) Complete all homework on time!
8) Go volunteer one day at SPCA as kerja amal!
9) Organize all notes.

Here, about everything's running through my mind now, that's why I can't really concentrate. Hopefully by writing all of them out is going to clear my mind, but now as I see, it is unlikely that I'm going to be able to concentrate. And I'm lacking social now. =) Going a bit haywire.

Determination Is The Key!

2011-11-28T02:36:00.001+08:00

Next year, I will be a form 5 student. No more fooling around, no more playing baby. I will be the eldest in the school next year. Juniors will be looking at us as role model. Juniors will be asking for our advise. I will make sure that I will provide the best shelter for them. I must grow up, because I will not have seniors anymore. This is serious, there's no other way.

I will be serious all year round! No more slacking around, no more skipping homework. I will need to do EXTRA homework next year. Must have the willpower to continue this the whole year! I must learn to enjoy the process of studying. Think of the future! Think of my goals! I must be hardworking! I must leap and fly! I know I can do this, I know I have the potential in me! It's not impossible! Stop using exclamation mark! Ok, ok, calm down. Lets do this slowly.

Ok, it has occur to me since ages ago that form 5 is the ultimate thang. Like SPM sets your future path, it will determine what university you will enter, what field are you going in, etc. So, it does freak me out that I don't really cope with form 4. I've always been so confident of my studies before form 4, now I'm just like everyone else, like I am just an ordinary person. Nothing wrong with being ordinary, it's just that I've always feel like I was on the top of the pyramid, now I'm demoted. I feel that I have to work my way up again.

As I've said above, I must go back to the start of form 4. Hectic, but at least life are purposeful. Complete all my homework, exercise and practice add maths. Ask when there are anything confusing. But things will not be the same. Because I will be the form 5 seniors for juniors, especially librarian board. Guidances will not be received but given. In midst of my chaotic studies, I will have to work hard to make the librarian board a better place. Things that I have to pay attention to: my studies, add math, history, biology, chemistry, physics, co-curriculum marks, librarian board and our rights and lastly, mental growth and health.

I've tried to balance all of it by the start of form 4, but it's just too hard. Next year, I would like to try it again. This time, I won't give up. There won't be time for me to give up. It's a new year and there will be a new me.

Falling Into The Old Trap Of Holiday

2011-11-26T01:38:00.001+08:00

This good old trap that I fall into every year end holiday is call procrastinate. I gave myself an assignment almost every holiday, no matter it is academic or non-academic, I always end up either rushing by the end of the holiday or completely give up on the idea. This holiday assignment I gave myself is do notes for history, Biology and Chemistry from the first chapter to the last. I have to do all these, or else I'm going to die next year. I should also be practicing my add math or else I would forgot all of them by school reopen.

I've already open a new book and started on my first page for history, HOWEVER, it has already been 5 days yet I haven't finish up that first page. Fail. At least even if I don't or didn't managed to do my Biology from first chapter, I've already have notes for it. I'm only doing it again so that it will be more organized. Chemistry is a must! I'm not very good at it, so I have to reabsorb all the concepts, ideas and all. My brain needs exercise. Sluggish already! GOT-TA-GET-MY-SELF-OUT-OF-THIS-TRAP!

Oi! Beratur La!

2011-11-21T23:52:00.001+08:00

As I said, I went to school today to take my RM100. As I expected, suckish system, slow, hot weather and LINE CUTTER! Seriously, those people don't know what is shame. You can put their face on the floor and drag them for 1km and still won't bleed. Here's what happened.

I reached school at about 10.20am. The queue was already very long. Form 3 and 4 in a line, some more everyone's cutting queue. So chaotic. Fine, I start queueing up, then suddenly the line split into two, saying one for form 3 and another for form 4. Fine, start over. Ok, now at least I'm in the shade. What? What the hell, split again? Seriously!

My goodness, the line split into two again. Then (forgive me, I'm not being racist but really all of them are Malays), a lot of Malays ask one of their friends to line up and then walk around joking themselves. Then when it's finally there, then they just "selamba" come into the line. Hey, that's call cutting queue. When I got quite front, a few gang of Malays(each gang about 4-5 people) do that. Then I don't know why, I just scold "Wei! Beratur keh tak? Jangan potong barisan boleh tak?". A lot just look at me and continue doing it. Like shit. ARE YOU PEOPLE UNCIVILIZED? Haven't you learn in moral, that you don't CUT QUEUE! My gosh!

I scold a few more times. I'm glad my friends clapped for me once, after I scolded one of the gang (which didn't feel guilty at all =.=). Once, I actually turn to the back and told the rest of the people queueing "DON'T LET THESE PEOPLE IN! THEY WANT TO CUT QUEUE!". I'm so proud of myself today for standing up to these uncivilized people.

Another problem is parents. Parents themselves cut the queue. Excuse me, you are bully school children! We're under 18 so we are still considered children! They just go to the front of the queue and ask the teacher to do theirs first. Teacher, please la, you must ask them to queue up! Not entertain them! This will only encourage the society to cut queue even more!

Oh god, please people, if next time people try to cut your line, SCOLD THEM! They are the one should be ashamed, not us! If you don't scold them, they thought everyone is like this and they will continue doing that! If you don't scold them, they don't feel ashamed! Scold them! ARGH~~~

Thanks, government! But I'm not gonna vote for BN, even when I get 21.

2011-11-21T01:27:00.001+08:00

Going to take my share of RM100 tomorrow at school. It'll just add into my savings. What for spend it? I'm too lazy to spend it. I would rather sit at home and blog. Anyway, I should be starting with my notes now. I've just started on my sejarah notes. Haven't done even the first page. Lack of motivation and willpower.

I want to manicure my nails. I want to buy new french pink nail polish from Elianto. When will I be going to anywhere that have Elianto? I'm trying to have it shape symmetry, so I try to make it all roundish if not my second finger will be odd shape. Very hard to shape it because I don't have a proper nail file. Anyway, I'm more careful with my nails nowadays and I'm not gonna cut it, unless one of them break.

Ok, now I lack of inspiration to continue this post. Bye now.

Since UPSR Results Are Out..

2011-11-18T14:51:00.001+08:00

We might as well take this as a topic! Actually I steal this topic from Azfar's blog, since I think I have quite some opinion to add in. Congratulation to those who had reached their target or those how did very well in your UPSR! Anyway, to those who didn't reach your target and those who didn't get as well as you usually do, darn it. It's only UPSR, at times you will know that UPSR means nothing when you're in secondary school, then PMR means nothing when you're in Form 4 and 5. You can be as suckish as you like to be when you're in primary school or before form 3, because it doesn't really matter, you can suddenly be brilliant in form 4 or 5, because for me, that is when you will really learn a thing or two. Form 1 to 3 are kinda like revision of primary school stuff, just in a different language.

Anyway, my holiday has officially start! Should start doing my notes for Biology, Chemistry and History.

From Form 4 To Form 5

2011-11-16T21:37:00.001+08:00

I remember when I was young, about standard 1, then my sisters are already in form 5. I remember wanting to be in form 5, I wanted to be older then. I guess being form 5 is just over rated huh? I used to think being a form 5 is so old. It's the last year of your secondary education. I mean, it sounds old and it FEELS old. I am old now. Oh shoot.

It will be the last year of my secondary school life ( unless I take form 6). I will be the old wise seniors in the eyes of my juniors. I will not have any seniors to look for advise or help because by next year I myself are the senior in question. I mean, it does feel nice to be the one people look up to, but it doesn't feel right to have nobody to lean on when days are tough.

We will soon be battling through lots of knowledge (and useless sejarah facts and propaganda). It will be a dreadful year. I'll have to focus on a lot of things. I will have to work my hardest to be a good chairman for my fellow juniors, I will have to do my last final attempt to be a good funding director, I will have to make up for all the time I've lost during form 4, restudy all the form 4 stuff while absorbing all the new form 5 things, I'll have to train my brain to be alert at all time. There's just so many things to focus, I can't afford to relax. Plus, I want to get a scholarship.

I will not have much time to spare for my Wudo anymore. I will go until my co-curriculum book is full and participate in the National Wudo Championship since I want to get high marks. I don't think now I will be getting much chance to help out on Saturdays now since that my parents are so irritated by it(mummy I know you will read this, especially when Yen's in the house =)) . Actually I don't know why you guys are so irritated by it, I know it's troublesome to send me out and waking up early when you can actually rest on Saturday, but I've already told you I can ask others to send me there, you don't even have to wake up. Take this as my leisure activities, I don't go out as often as teenagers these days and I don't spend money when I'm teaching children unlike going to shopping with my friends, right? And when I'm going to teach KIDS you know that I'm not doing anything bad, don't you? Besides, I enjoy doing it! =D

Anyway, finish my explanation to my mom. Lastly I just want to add in a few phrase of lyric to express what I'm feeling now from the song "What I did for love" although the name of the song sounds so unrelated to what I've just said above.

"Kiss today goodbye,
The sweetness and the sorrow.
Wish me luck, the same to you."

Farewell, my form 4 life.

Red Belt? Nah~

2011-11-13T00:48:00.001+08:00

Went exam today. Honestly, I think I won't be getting my red belt. Because~ all pattern I've made mistakes. There's just so many things around, kept losing the momentum thus forgot the whole damn thing. =.= Worst of all, I have to do the Wudo 6 MYSELF! Solo! My gosh, I was so out of breath already. Ah, whatever I screwed it.

Anyway, I've made quite a joke today. I was chatting with a bunch of primary blue belt kids. I intended to say big sifu's wife (direct translation from chinese) but instead I said sifu's eldest wife. That was like, opps.. XD Anyway, had fun today. Sparred a bit today, kick from a wrong angle, stupid, now my toe hurts. Have to rest kow kow this weekend (Sunday only... =()..

Ok, guys. Bye~

I Hate Getting Hurt During Practice

2011-11-12T00:21:00.001+08:00

This is so bad. I actually hurt (kinda sprain) my thigh during Wudo practice today. And I'm suppose to have my wudo exam TOMORROW! I can barely walk like a normal person, how am I suppose to kick like a pro tomorrow? I hurt myself easily nowadays. =.=

So now what? I really hope that I will be alright for the exam tomorrow. It's for red belt. Ah, anyway, lets discuss about the exam format. So there's horse ridding stunt, back stunt, forward stunt, side stunt, kicking stunt, ah, the normal ones la. Then we have pattern - Wudo 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 and the latest one Wudo 6. I seriously hope that I don't forget any of them. There's rumors saying that it's easy to fail red belt exam. Anyway, I've been inform that I have to do a free sparing as well. It's no biggie, like I don't enjoy hitting people. Oh ya, this reminds me that I have to bring my mouth guard as well!

Well, I better go pack every thing now. I will be needing my mouth guard, panadol, tissue, my uniform, and ahhhh, Strepsils! The most important of them all. =) So good luck to me, and until next time, bye~

The Road Not Taken

2011-11-01T00:58:00.001+08:00

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference. Robert Frost (1874–1963). Mountain Interval.

Poem

2011-11-01T00:55:00.002+08:00

Should I take the harder road,
that I shall risk falling,
but the only road that will bring me soaring towards my dreams?
Or should I take the safer road,
that will guarantee me the future I want
but will never get me the dream I want?
Am I such a risk-taker?
Am I such a dare-devil?

You tell me...

- Tan Wan Teng -

We will never have enough holidays...

2011-10-31T00:11:00.000+08:00

So, it's time to go back to school. I feel rested but ah, we can never have enough holidays. Who wouldn't like to lay around and be lazy? I will not be updating a lot now, since the holiday is over.

Or not! Since there's no need to do homework and there's no need to stress myself for exam, I might be online updating. Who knows? But I might be studying and making notes before they take back the text books. Ah! I hate it.

Ok, until next time, good bye~~

Reliving the past : Kuen Cheng (1) Children's Day 2011

2011-10-28T19:07:00.001+08:00

I've just come back from Kuen Cheng (1) primary school, my dear old primary school, for number 1, reunion and number 2, visiting! But it doesn't feel as fun as before, the school changed a lot. Even the concert style changed. There used to be a lot of group performances, but now it's mostly individual, like they were chosen by certain teacher. The school used to look more traditional. Anyhow, I enjoyed myself. But they shouldn't have done latin dance, since now everyday we're shuffling~

So I met Jing Yee, Vicky, both my closer friend, some not that close friends like Weng Chen, Benny Ow, Brenda Tan, Kuan Li Jean, Deanna Song, Yu Hang. Some of them I don't even remember, but this Matthew guy say he remember my face, weird, I don't even remember seeing you! And some guy named Jonathan, I really don't know who the hell is he. But since, I've already told myself not to be shy and be friendly to everyone, so I did. Felt awkward from time to time, but it's ok, at least I talked like usual. XD. I'm glad that Cikgu Wong, my former BM teacher who improved my BM by a lot remembers me! She was so happy today, never saw her laugh as wide as today in my life! She even hit my tummy when I said I got A for my BM in PMR. Ha! Ah, that's why I like her when others don't, she can be so cute at times.

We were supposed to go together with my no-longer-working former class teacher, Miss Tan to fetch food from classes. In the end, we separated not long after the students left the hall. Haiz, what a pity. It's ok, but I'm so sad that Mr Fong, the teacher who appointed me to be a prefect (who my mom told me that likes me a lot) forgotten who I was. He remembered the Jonathan guy, but he doesn't remember me, then I just blurt out "You used to like me a lot!". My friend "blurt out","Wah, so muka tebal one?". Anyway, he kinda compensate for it when he brings us to hunt for food!

I ate so much today. These kids bring so much food! Kids, you're still kids, you don't eat that much! And Benny Ow was one of the teacher's son, so his kinda feeling at ease, he kept calling those kids lengzhai and such. So easy to make kids laugh.

Now all the class have projector and speakers in the class. But I'm so confuse when one of the class played "Three Kingdom"(or something, I don't know the english name, it's china history)三国演义. What the hell, I don't even know the story myself! It's history my dear kids, this is children's day, don't stress yourselves.

Now, one thing I hate about this children day is, NO BALLOONS ARE ALLOWED! What is children's day without balloons? I've even bring extra money to buy endless balloon! Poor kids, you can't even buy balloons these days.

When we were too full and have walked through all the classes twice, we decided to sit in the canteen and chat. Since Vicky and I were both shy during primary school and both felt awkward at that moment so we chatted. Then I saw my photos in Jing Yee's DSLR, I look like crap man! Benny is such a bad photographer! Haha! After taking group jumping photos, I've actually raced Vicky in a new pair of shoes which hurts like hell, but I lost. Haha, I haven't practice in a while, ok?

Then when they were about to leave, Deanna kinda announce that she's going to Australia next month or next year, I can't remember which. Her mom was there too. I wonder why, since she haven't finish her SPM, go there for what? But anyhow, I can't help but to feel a little envy. I've always wanted to study in Australia, but I have work and stress my ass of to find a scholarship that will fly me there, but she's just rich enough to decide and fly there. But I know that if I make it, I will be damn proud of myself that no money can buy me.

P.S.: Sudden rain spoils my mood. =(

Sudden Un-confidence

2011-10-28T00:06:00.000+08:00

I'm going back to my old primary school, Kuen Cheng tomorrow. Recently started reconnecting with primary school friends. Some surprisingly I feel quite comfortable chatting and talking with them although we weren't close during primary school, but some I still feel the gap between the "popular" ones and the "unpopular" ones.

I were one of the "unpopular". I stuck with my own gang, occasionally played with some others friendly ones. I weren't kicked aside but I couldn't really fit into those "popular" world. They laugh about other things that I don't find funny, reserve to themselves, to their own gang. I just don't feel comfortable talking with them.

I were watching their photos just now. Some of my closer friends were in the same secondary school with them. They seems very close. Somehow, their life looks so eventful, so interesting. The weird thing about old friends is you look weird if you commented or liked their photos or something. I even feel awkward wanting to like their photo. What the hell man?

Ah, I don't know how to describe. I'm not saying that I enjoy thinking like that, but this is just one of my random feelings. Blog is a way to spread what I feel, not necessarily what I agree or not agree. I'm adding this part because certain someone in my life is currently pointing out whether he or she agrees or doesn't agree and started shooting point of view. I'm sorry but that makes people quite uneasy.
___________________________________________________________
(After dinner..)

My confidence is back.. No problem, homey~ I'll shine~~

First Timers : Ice Skating

2011-10-25T01:00:00.000+08:00

After a long and pointless planing, we finally go for our ice skating trip. We plan to reach at 10a.m. but apparently nobody seems to really care to be punctual. All of us are late, and even take time to eat breakfast there, except me. I've already ate at home.

After renting our skate shoes, we were off to go. I was shock at first to feel how heavy the shoe is. Walking on ice with the shoe and walking on ground with the ice skating shoe is so different. It is so slippery. After about an hour of shouting( I can't control myself!) I've finally master the technique behind it, although it's still very new to me, and I can't brake. I haven't learn how to. So I can't go fast.

There's a lot of people by 1p.m. something. So the ice starts to melt very fast, so it looks a bit like a lake. The water makes it extra hard to skate on. We've been waiting for the truck to resurface the ice for a long time. Finally it did. But it made it worst. The ice is more slippery and hard to keep your balance after resurfacing it. I didn't fall at all before I master how to skate and I've fell twice after resurfacing which I skate for only 15 minutes.

I felt so sorry for Anati, Khuratul and Azfar for waiting so long for us. They arrived late and thought that it's not worth it to pay RM 15 just to play for 1 hour plus. So they waited for us to come up and join them for lunch. In the end, only I went up to join them for lunch since the other's so addicted.

We went to Ichiban Ramen for lunch. I've spent RM 31 for lunch. That was like, OH MY GOD!!! And then we went to shop for shoes. It's one of my goal to do today. Buy a new shoe. Because I'm wearing legging for the first time on this Friday for my primary school reunion. So we walked and went into Padini Concept Store. I've always like this shop. Turn out, Anati and Khuratul are indeed women! The three of us was going crazy being surrounded by nice things! Only Azfar felt a bit bored. After all, shopping is more of a girl thing. =D

So I've bought a pair of flatties( what my mom calls them) which looked quite nice. I like it. I love shopping with Anati and Khuratul. They are the best kind of shoppers to go shopping with. They show the same enthusiasm as I was. Ah, Anati, Khuratul, lets go shopping together next time, lets go Forever 21!

So I came home without a scratch. Just a bruise on each leg for wearing the ice skating shoes. I did much better than I expect. Apart from ice skating, I enjoyed shopping the most. Actually that's the only two thing we did today. Haha! Until next time, good night, I've taken my medication. Feeling dizzy now. Bye~

Japanese Tour @ Smk Cheras - 19th Oct 2011

2011-10-20T01:52:00.000+08:00

It's a yearly event, a japanese school will come to our school to visit. Like last year, I've taken up the job to be one of the tour guides. It's better than last year in fact. Last year, not one in my group can speak English. At least this year, my group some of them are sporting, lively and speaks basic English. Communication is still a problem but at least we manage to get them to tour around. I've brought my videocam today so I can show you guys bits of it.

All in Baju Tradisional.

With lotus.

Candid.

Tall, medium, short.

"I'm sexy and I know it~"

This can be my latest profile picture.

There's my group, except for Azfar, the guy in purple.

So this is it. Just a short update. What I enjoy the most isn't the japanese (sorry!), but the time I spent with my group members because of this event. Thank you.

Updates

2011-09-25T00:09:00.002+08:00

I am so so so sorry for not YET posting the photos for the Pelantikan, because the photos are in my dad's computer. However, there's another interesting event, the National Wudo Championship 2011.

I enter for sparring (for my weight range, but not to post it online) and Wudo 3(it's a pattern). I finally won a sparring, so I get a bronze. My co-curriculum is going to get a lot of marks for it. But sadly, my wudo 3 can't even get through the first round, so ... bad luck. =)

Recently I grow very sick of a kind of feeling, but no, I am not to be discussing on this blog, this is a happy blog... But on tumblr.... XP

Pelantikan dan Penghargaan Pengawas Pusat Sumber & AJK Koperasi

2011-08-21T01:55:00.002+08:00

I'm sorry I can't post the photos yet because I'm using my sister's computer, so I can't store the photos here. But I'll post it as soon as I can.

Pelantikan was so awesome. Well, my wish did came true. I'm now the president of the librarian board for year 2011/2012, but it really doesn't matter whether I'm the president or not, after all our goal is to make the librarian board better.

The president for the koperasi is a form 3 guy. I'm surprise that their teacher didn't let a form 4 take the post. Teachers always want to let the form 5s get the highest mark for co-curriculum. Anyway, I like that guy. Humble.

So this year Apple and Jamil is the MC. Started with a speech from Brandon and the previous president for Koperasi then speech from the orang-orang besar( principal etc.). Then all the certs given away. Then finally here I come.

I went up to let the PIBG guy put the blazer on me, then followed by the form 3 Koperasi pengerusi. Then I went up to have my speech then same to the koperasi chairman la. Anyway, the majlis ended quite soon after that. Then the form 5 librarian seniors played 2 videos for us.

The first one was a collection of photos from the kursus asas. I love that video, very much. I was actually having the urge to cry on that moment, but I didn't la. I'm pretty touched by it. The second video is the form 5s doing Party Rock Anthem and live shuffling. I LOVE that video too! Especially the part where Brandon was singing to the camera. I asked for both of the video because the first one is a beautiful memory of everyone and the second one is a beautiful memory of the form 5s.

Here I want to stress more on thanking my seniors. They were no doubt that they will be the batch of seniors that I will miss the most. I've never seen such teamwork before. I feel their enthusiasm(or maybe it's just me?). I love you guys very much and I will certainly miss you guys. Days won't be the same anymore after you guys are gone. For the first time, I... no, we will not have seniors, for the first time, we are the only seniors. It sure felt nice to always have people to count on but it's our time to spread our wings and fly. I will try my best to ensure this kind of spirit, this kind of teamwork will last and the next generation will inherit it. Thank you so much for everything that you guys have done for this board. Thank you.

May the best man wins...

2011-08-18T02:14:00.002+08:00

The PPS pelantikan is this Friday( it's Friday, Friday, come on get down on Friday~~).. I think I can handle if the next chairman isn't me, I'm not sure that I can really do that or not, but I think I'm open enough to handle it. =)

I'm still learning how to shuffle. I want to shuffle on that day. Hope that I can master it by then and doesn't make a fool of myself ( ah~~ who cares? I'm so used to it anyway~). Anyhow, I still hope that next year will be a fruitful, productive, successful year, even if I didn't become the president. I've been dedicated to the Librarian Board since I'm in it, I love it too much to ruin it just because I didn't get the president post nor will I give up my dedication and effort to make it a better year, you hear me KJ?

I guess the result will be announced tomorrow. Shit, butterflies all over my stomach. Ah, take it easy man! But I will really miss having the seniors with me, chatting when the library is empty. I hope that juniors next year won't be so scare of us. I got the impression that they are very reluctant to us ( serius looking seniors). Please, come! I won't eat you! I swear~

Anyway, it's very late now and I haven't print out my speech and pack my school bag, so see you guys next time. I'll try my best to bring a camera on Friday and post it here( papa don't let me bring the new Cam-recorder... =( this might be the only time that his daughter be having a speech.)

Vocabulary

2011-07-24T02:26:00.002+08:00

I'm suddenly envious of others. I can't seems to expend my vocabulary. I was reading other's blog last 5 minutes and I wonder why theirs sounds like adults and why mine don't. I notice that all of my blog post, I seems to recycle the vocabularies. Nothing new. How can I improve my English then?

I always have the problem of can't find the exact suitable word for what I want to describe. Maybe the word doesn't exist in English? I don't know. Sometimes I make me feel a little frustrated. =( I need to read dictionaries as bedtime story then?

P.S.: This is a random sudden thought. Don't mind if you don't get the point. I don't think it even have one.

Kursus Asas 2011

2011-07-17T18:39:00.002+08:00

Yesterday, nice. Today, body ache + stomach ache. Why? Let me tell you.

Yesterday was the annual librarian board's "play day" a.k.a. Kursus Asas. Brandon ask us to reach there by 7.30 am. Reached already, the gate also haven't open. It's ok, I go social with my juniors. Then the gate open already. Then all of the librarians go to the assembly area. Then after a while, activity begins.

5 groups were soon formed. Kean Jhun's group is Black Eyed Peas, he claimed, it's full of nerds. Mine is JUSTIN BIEBER! Then Siew Ying's Lady Gaga, another one I don't remember who's in it, Katy Perry and lastly Micheal Jackson led by Muhd Jamil, another MJ. Then we were required to make a dance for each of our group, a motto and a "visi". Motto for Justin Bieber? Easy job la. "Never say never"~~ And oh ya, Kean Jhun became Penghulu the Sick and I'm Penghuluwati the awesome~~

They then blindfold us and take us to the field. I fell into the drain, twice. They then separate our group and our task is to find our group members. I mistrusted some of my seniors that came to sabotage us. Until I realize the pattern, then I say to one of my seniors that try to pull be away from my team " You are not my group!". Thinking back, it sounds quite stupid. And I ate some flour. I don't know which senior threw flour into my mouth when I'm talking.

Then we proceed to Explore Race. Justin Bieber is just awesome. Part 1 of the race was nice. It's so lucky that all of our group members are so willing to do anything to win. My team was led by Joseph, a new form 4 junior. I think that he was a big contributor in our group, and that's why we are the 1st for the Explore Race, part 1!

Break for lunch. Luckily this year's lunch isn't Ayam Masak Merah again. I really phobia to that dish already, so spicy. Then me and Kean Jhun as the penghulu and penghuluwati had to become prefects in order not to get punishments.

Continue part 2 of Explore Race. Justin Bieber got a 3 minutes head start, so when we got our clue. We went to the field. There we had to climb under chairs, in the muddiest water ever and roll on the muddy water. =( Then next station, we had to climb on chairs. Then next station was the worst of all. Fear factor, they call. It's more like gross factor. In the end I have eaten about 5 clove of garlic. Argh... Dragons may breath fire but I bet I'm more powerful, I breath garlic! Feel like a pregnant women with morning sickness the whole day because of this. Then we have to let our group members eat biscuits suspending in the middle of the air without using their hands. " Best teamwork" is the comment we get from the seniors.

And after a few more challenges, we finally reach the end of the race. "Ok, Justin Bieber, I have to say sorry because..... you are not the second group to reach, but you are the 1st! " . Oh my, first time playing these games that my group got the 1st! Feel so nice. That's why, "Never say never"~~

After everything, I was practically taking a bath in public, with my clothes on! I looked so much cleaner after that, but unfortunately, everything under the outerwear is equally as muddy, if you know what I mean. Everything ended soon after that. My spec's broken because someone step on it, so I'm wearing my old spec, looking quite nice. =) I didn't realize but I've kept mummy waiting outside for like an hour or so. All that's above was awesome. This year is truly a success, but what follows under here is quite unpleasant.

After waiting for half an hour, mummy and yen came back. I just got into the car and got scold very badly by yen. Yes, she had waited for a very long time and she's post-call. But you there, we have also waited for you as long as you have waited for me, and perhaps we have even waited longer than you have, so stop scolding people every chance you have because you there have sisters not for you to scold, but to care for! And you there have left me sitting in the back row feeling so sad and pissed off, crying in the back row with a broken spec and tired body and you have to take away the only thing I feel good about! Now you think about that now! It doesn't mean you are the most intelligent one in our family and the only one with a doctor in front of our name and lived alone in UK and have to work on call and the only one having the potential to earn more then you have the privileged to scold people when ever you're pissed!

Lost of Motivation

2011-07-08T23:57:00.002+08:00

I no longer have the drive I have at the start of the year. I drag my homework to the maximum period before submitting. I no longer want to study really hard, thinking that if I revise I'll understand( but actually I can if I revise). Always feeling lazy, how I wish I can magically get a week off.

But I do have a new goal, and it's learn how to shuffle! Seriously it looks so damn odd. I did manage to do like a 3 second of normal looking shuffle but after that I can't do it anymore. =( I want to learn how to dance. So nice if I can just listen to some music and start dancing without worrying that I look damn awkward.

I've cooked my first meal for my family last few days. It turned out pretty well! At least nobody got sick after eating my cooking~ And it tasted pretty nice too. I'm just talented in cooking. Haha, kidding!

I'm bored and wanted to update my blog. So that's it, bye~ Chao~

Freelancing

2011-07-03T00:33:00.002+08:00

First of all, some updates of my life. Just had the 1 Murid 1 Sukan 1 Malaysia run today. It looks kinda like a demonstration when we first started. But walking 1.5 km didn't make my feet hurt. Shopping did.

I went shopping with my sister and her boyfriend looking for formal clothes for her new job starting next week. My legs, hurt like hell. Anyway, I went into Vincci. Shouldn't have gone in. I'll go mad whenever I went into 1) Kitchen department, and 2) shoe shop. These are the place where I can't control my desire.

And I saw I very very very very very very very nice three inches white flora patterned high heels. I really like it, but it's RM 71.10 after 10% discount. =( Can any of my stalker please buy me. It's a bit risky for me to spend 70 something on my first pair of three inches high heels. And I usually kept my shoes (except for my slipper and school shoe) in the cupboard. But this, I REALLY LOVE IT! The last time I miss the shoe that I really like, I thought about it for like a whole week or 2. Haiz, my sister say she'll buy for me when she had her 1st salary, but that's a month away. It's just not meant to be mine. T.T

So now, moving away from my heartache, I wanted to tell Nicole especially, that I'm going freelance. It means I won't be sticking to our gang so much from now on. Just for me to find back the old me. But it doesn't mean that I'm going to be depress or something, Everyone can find me for anything, I'll be very friendly to EVERYONE! =) Come~~

Hormones, hormones, leave me alone. I don't like to feel insecure. And here I wanted to tell you guys something. Please don't joke with me about me getting fat or heavy or figure things, I'm pretty insecure these days, and I have bad childhood memory about these thing. I've never really got over it, so just for this while la. Ok?

Conned

2011-06-29T23:16:00.002+08:00

I just got conned by the 8tv show, Showdown 2011. Since it's for final, then I decided to vote for my favorite crew, Elecoldxhot. I vote 10 votes directly( save time) then I got check my account. I thought it only cost 15 sen, then I sent 5 more votes.

Then it replies. It took Rm 5 for 10 votes. Oh shoot, and my account is empty. It's suppose to take rm 10 more. But I decided not to top up until the final ends. =( My poor account. DAMN YOU SHOWDOWN!

What the hell am I doing here? I should be doing my homeworks. OMG, MY HANDS AND EYES ARE STUCK TO THE COMPUTER! HELP~~~

Nah, just kidding. I'm bored. Cheng Cheng go back to Kampar take her stuff. She'll be starting work real soon. Nobody's going to pillow talk with me. Actually now also don't have already. Her boyfriend steal her away from me. =( Nah, go ahead~~

Got so used to talking bad about people and whining. Can't meditate, these things kept coming in my mind. =( Gotta stop doing all these. It's not good anyway. I want to be a monk also la.

Holiday's almost over!

2011-06-11T01:06:00.002+08:00

I don't want to go back to school yet. People just won't get tired of being lazy. I wanna stay at home. Luckily this holiday doesn't have a big pile of homework, just a Biology notes and that's all.

Actually I don't really have anything to say, but I felt like blogger is so lonely, nobody had updated their blog, so I come and update my blog.

Anyway, I don't know how are you guys suppose to answer this, you may just ignore this, but how exactly do you pronounce Reckon?

I am 15, going on 16...

2011-06-05T20:00:00.001+08:00

Sorry I'm here again. It's holiday! I can't help it! I've forgotten to mention this in my last post, so Ta Da~ Yep, my birthday's coming! I'm actually happy that I'm getting older! Usually I'll go like "I'm so old!" but now I'm like " Uh Hu! Birthday's coming!", after all, once a year only right? Greet it like an old friend!

I was thinking, if I lived in the olden days, I would be the ideal wife to be. I mean, I love to sew, I love to cook, I love to bake, I love to play with make ups, I love high heels. These are all so "women" right? I am actually very girlish inside, I was even very "manja" when I was small, it my weapon believe it or not. But it all stopped I think, when I was in standard 4, because I was constantly being laugh at for being fat( who cares now right? If you've seen me when I'm in primary school, you won't say that I'm fat anymore, HA!), then I found a girl in my class who was very in to "yo! yo!" things very cool, then I started to move into this "yo! yo!" stuff. Now I've even forgotten how to manja. It wouldn't fit my image now, would it?

And oh ya. I wanted to ask something. I'm quite confused because I'm kinda in the middle right now. Like, I wanna ask the guys (Chye Yee, Eric, Kean Jhun and Chin), do you guys consider me as a best friend? Well, for me, I certainly do, maybe a better best friend to Kean Jhun and Chye Yee compared to Chin and Eric. Erm, like right, when you guys go out like just to lepak(walking around the school, not really going out shopping and such) you guys wouldn't ask me to go together is it because maybe because you guys will somehow end up in the toilet or is it because I'm a girl after all so I would really fit in? And If like you guys wanted to hang out with the girl friends , would you guys ask me to hang out too, 'cause I'm not really the girl type of girl. Man, I'm really confused.. Comment please, guys..

In the end I'll like to share a little quote from Tuesdays With Morrie : "(Mitch), I embrace aging. The truth is, part of me is every age." - Morrie Schwartz -

Updating my life to y'all!

2011-06-05T00:37:00.003+08:00

Ah, when I'm too bored from refreshing and refreshing and refreshing facebook, I'll come here and update, so this holiday, my posts might seems a lot, so hope that you can be a bit patient with me. Haha...

So, I went to Wudo practice few days ago, I kinda injured myself. Why is it kinda? Because I don't know muscles aches consider as injuries or not. Haha, and a little bruise on my right leg, because I kick my trainer's elbow. My mom ask me " so he also bruise la?", then I answered her, " no la! elbow where will bruise de?" Haha! And my mom accidentally hit my leg too hard, so now also bruised already. I hate bruises. =(

I find interact club very expensive. Why is that? At first, we are required to buy name cards that costs like Rm30+, then interact T-shirt Rm20. Now installation day is closing, need to pay for this, pay for that, must cost about Rm10, then additional if we want to go to other school's IU Day or something, we had to buy our own tickets, again costs money. Then now they say want to buy a shirt, grey shirt as our formal interact uniform, which will cost like Rm 80 ( I like branded stuff, ok?). Use so much money, how I wish it's free.

Currently had no updates on my class, because it's holiday. Talk a little personal things here then. I wanted to keep my fingernails this holiday, for 2 weeks. Apparently I can't, because I can't take the need to constantly washing my hands because it gets dirty easily. Going to cut it off later.

I wanna learn some dance. Stumble across a video last few days. How to glide. I've been practicing. I can do moonwalk but I somehow can't do this "glide". Hmm.. I wanna learn I hell lot of dance moves la...

There's always a maybe

2011-06-01T01:51:00.003+08:00

(First of all, you may ignore this post, just one of my random thoughts. Might look a bit silly here.)

I don't know. I can't decide. I maybe liking you, I may not. Who knows? I thought I'm so over about boys, but somehow I'm still influenced by it. Haiz...

My sister said I'm like so disappointed in boys, I feel so too. I don't know la. Hormones, ish. Sometimes I even feel like Angeline. Boys are nice friends, but things turns ugly if it comes to this stage, Liking. Haiz..

Nah,, done random post. Sorry ya, if I updated too much, I know sometimes it can be annoying, because last time someone's blog updated too much I also pek cek.. Haha

I'm just a little too not over you

2011-06-01T01:39:00.003+08:00

Seems like I haven't truly pass the "emo" period. My sister said I'm just "unstable". Yeah, I think so too. What to do? Always feel like I'm not as good as before, unattractive(this doesn't matter), doesn't mean anything to my friends( I know my family love me!) , under appreciated and always doubting myself and others. What had happened to me?

Perhaps I'm going through the teenage-stage. You know? Drowning in self pity condition? Haiz, I don't know. I feel like I'm always self pitying nowadays, how unattractive. I wasn't as emo as a few months(or weeks, I don't know) back but I'm still not quite pass this stage yet. Be patience man, be patience.

Perhaps Chye Yee's right, I just have to find something else to do. Learn, he said. Maybe that is what I should do, find something that I'm really good in. Be the expert. When the time comes, I'll shine. And when I shine, prepare to shad your eyes. XD

Which is more important?

2011-05-28T00:17:00.002+08:00

Of course all of us want to excel in every aspect such as studies, being the teacher's favorite pet, sports etc.. But when we are old and we're sitting on the old rocking chair, pondering about life, what would you want to be then?

By then, beauty and fame wouldn't mean much. Beneath the wrinkled, covered in old-spots skin, I would want to have wisdom, have a meaningful life and a great pool of family. Being great at school would mean much by then.

Why would study mean so much to me now? If I didn't want to become a veterinarian, I wouldn't have to study so hard. I DON'T need to. But it will matter now, because I want to be a veterinarian, because I have goals to achieve, because I want to make a change.

I would care about sport now. I have no yearning towards that part. But I do have to earn some hearts from teachers. I want to be the head librarian. But it wouldn't need much effort, I usually respect them by nature(of me).

By the end of my life, I would want to have been a good parent. I would love to have children, that's why I'm scare that I can never get married. I would want to have a few people whose life I've made a difference. I would want to be a old lady that people can talk to and ask advise from.

The most important thing for me is mental development, not academically, it's values.

Ponder, ponder and ponder.

The Sims 3, part 2!

2011-05-27T20:09:00.018+08:00

Finally, I've started playing my family in the Sims 3! I don't know what to name this family so I named it Amanah ( lame leh?) because all of us became close when we're in 3 Amanah. I've added Chin here, so here's some screenshot of the people and the house that I've built!

This is the house that I built

Side view, with the pool at the back.

Back View, with the pool.

Another side view.

From the left, Me, Nanami and Chye Yee.( I know, it looks nothing like the real life)

From the left, Kean Jhun, Eric, Nicole and Chin. ( Once again, looks nothing like the real people in real life.)

It's freakin' hard to control 7 people at the same time. There's only 2 toilet for 7 people, so they kept peeing themselves. =( I try to let them interact but I can't concentrate on everyone, as a result, Chin become lonely. Haha.

The Sims 3!

2011-05-25T00:03:00.002+08:00

I've finally created a family of sims, consisting my friends! Mereka termasuk lah Me, Nicole, Siew Ying, Eric, Chye Yee and Kean Jhun. In the game I named them as Jasmine Tan, Nicole Poh, Nanami Watanabe, Eric Ng, Chris Lambert ( Ha!) and Gareth Ng respectively. So nice.

There so no house available big enough for 6 people so I just buy a piece of land and start building it myself. Freakin' hard to make a nice house, the usual house that I built is just like a cardboard box, and I determine not to make this one too. Trying to plan my building now. It's taking me hours to make this family ready for game. I'll try to take the photos of each sims(if I figure out how to take the photos) but it looks nothing like the really person. Ha!

That's all for now. Thank you. Bye Bye.

Midterm Exam of Form 4

2011-05-21T00:36:00.002+08:00

Pa came back from Vietnam already! He got me the Vietnamese hat that I wanted. Absolutely love it! It looks a bit heavy but it's not! Oh my god! I love that so much!

So now move on to my results. Isn't a good one though. Here are a few that I'm proud of( little bit only). My PE got 44 correct out of 50. Then my civic got 94%, therefore highest in the class! At least I got one, although it's just civic.

The unexpected: History: 32 out of 40!! Honestly I thought I was going to get like 20 something only.

The disappointed: Biology: 86% which is good, I know, but my target was to be the highest in my class and Eric got 89%. $#%#$^&!!! The Biggest Disappointment is my add math, I only got 50%, but who cares right? My sister ask me to fail it also, at least I didn't fail. Haha!

I am now on a project which is making my own purse. Damn complicated. Now it's half way done but I need to get some beads. Yellow. But had to go to Macy( I think) only can find the kind that I want. If possible I'll post some photos of my done purse.

Opened!

2011-05-17T00:49:00.003+08:00

我想开了！I've finally gone through the "emo" stage. Nothing in particular happened. It just came to me all of a sudden. I don't wanna be drowning in the sea of self pity. I wanna be attractive, be well-respected, be confident! Confident is really the key to people's attention, it might not be those that is very affectionate type or those that is negative or anything. People get attracted to confident people they spread the special kind of aura, making people wanting to be close with you. Besides self-pity ain't attractive, right?

All of the sudden become the "sifu" kat sini pulak? Anyway, just had my add math exam today, honestly it's like hell. I studied like a mad woman and when I study like a mad woman I usually dream what I've just read, meaning miserable sleeping time. I hate those nights. I used to study history like that, then when I went to sleep, each time I just fall asleep then the image of a certain page in the text book kept appearing, then I would wake up, again and again. =(

Anyway, the exam was pretty bad. 50 % can't finish it,while 50% unsure. I can't even solve a single question on log and indices. But I could care less anymore, because my sister here, tells me "just fail it, it's fine to fail form 4 add math. You catch up somehow when you're in form 5". What an advice right? Don't you just love family that lets you slag?

P.s.: Live life to the fullest! There ain't time to lose being sad over yourself! Who cares what others think, I'll always be there for each and everyone of you reading here! =D

Open up

2011-05-14T19:05:00.005+08:00

Drowning in self pity. I didn't realize that by myself, my sister told me. Then I think about it, at first I wanted to deny it, but after some thinking, it's better to be honest, ya, I am drowning in self pity. Never thought that I myself will come to a stage of this. Oh my god, what the hell? I ain't friends with self pity and now he wouldn't leave? =(

My family know that what is troubling me. My sister told me to see the qualities in myself. I used to be the one who is telling people this. What's got into me? I know all of that, that the superficial means nothing more than superficial but I can't seems to get it into my head, of short, I don't believe it. I used to, but now I'm trying to believe it back again.

I tried to tell my friends. But I don't know why I kept thinking that nobody will understand. Maybe they will but I can't seems to open up, thinking that they will judge me. Nobody likes to be judge. I know that they won't but I seems to keep giving reason to myself not to tell them. Maybe I just want people to know that I'm not feeling great, maybe I want to play the victim. I don't know. If I'm working, I might take a 2 weeks leave and go to some where nice for a vacation to clear up my mind, throw away bad thoughts, turn off my phone let there be nothing disturb me. But unfortunately I'm still a student, there's duty for me at school, gotta find another way to flush away bad thoughts.

I've ask a friend who wants to be a psychologist(his name starts with a A, =)) to somehow give me some counseling (that might or might not work, everyone who knew try to give me some, some that I've already know but just can't get me on my feet). Maybe I just want people to know, so just hear me out. Another friend of mine told me that he used to feel the same, but the time for me will come, as it for him.

I've got a feeling that I shouldn't post this post. That these are stuff that I should only keep to myself. If you got nothing to comment about the things above, can you please comment something maybe nice about me? =) It makes me smile.

Lastly, a quote for myself : " It's neither fair nor unfair, Nobody Owens, it simply is." - The Graveyard Book -

Updates

2011-05-08T01:12:00.002+08:00

As people are starting to complain that I didn't update my blog anymore, so I'll just update you guys some daily current events of mine.

I've just got my hair cut today by a fairly handsome guy that looks a bit like JJ Lin especially when he look down. =) Like~ So my hair now looks nicer. And I have a new spec.

Now having the Mother's Day and Teacher's Day DIY card sales, but it's not going nicely. This was suppose to be the year's grand event that will be evaluated for the Funding Award but as it's not going that nice, so the profit won't be that nice too. Gotta sell something nice on the carnival if I want to get that award. ( And I really want to get it..)

Exam's coming REAL soon. In fact, on Monday. Haven't started a bit, and I know that I'm going to die in some subjects because this is form 4 and I can't only begin to study on the day before the exam but ah~

The thing on the last post is still bothering me. Is it just me and my hormone or is it really bad? I can't tell. I tried to be not that sensitive but I can't help but to feel offended. I'll have to settle it, soon. Hope things won't turn bad.

I ain't that happy nowadays...

2011-04-23T01:19:00.002+08:00

Thinking too much will really drives a person mad. I'm one of the mad man. I hate to do that be I can't seems to shut my mind up. I didn't understand why people says that change in environment will change one's behavior, now I see, when things happened to myself. It happened in both my family and my friends in which I do not want to discuss any of them here because it will cause unnecessary judgement towards me and hurtful to some.

Am I able to cope with the changes? Am I going to win my own internal war? Don't ask me, I've never felt like this before. These are dark days for me. I've never felt so depress for such a long period. I wanted to talk as usual, but I am always waiting for the right time and the right person to talk to, but that tine never came, and for the first time I've kept things to myself. I don't like to bare it myself. I ain't as strong as I look. Ha, you may not know. Not much people know.

Giving myself motivations, pity myself once in a while when I lie in the bed not yet asleep. Self healing is not the best cure for me, I hate being alone. But in times, it might just be something that I had to go through whether I like it or not, it's a lesson that I must learn. Let's just let this unknown issue left unknown.

Anugerah Cemerlang

2011-04-03T00:23:00.002+08:00

Went to the Anugerah Cemerlang today! Got money!! XD But it's bad that they give less money to those who got 7As and 1B compare to those who got straight but 7As. =( But it's ok la.. I love the money I get.

Eric made my dad awkward. Haha! Who ask him to stare at my dad?! My dad now kinda take him as a weirdo. But Eric always do that right? So I didn't think it was that awkward. Ah~ Who cares la.. Eric, stop staring at people! XD

I wonder why kids these days are so rich! Saw a few DSLR during normal schooling days but today I saw those I thought didn't own one bring one! You know what I mean? Meaning a lot of people own DSLR nowadays. Ah~ Why ar? I want one too, but I'm not gonna buy it now, it would be a total waste of money. For me, it's just a new toy and I'll get sick of it quickly, and I don't have enough money left if I buy one. I'm gonna get one when I'm older, and wiser and richer. =D

During the PIBG meeting, my dad was sitting in side the hall listening while I play at the back stage! Went to kacau Chye Yee(he's in charge of the PA system) with Nicole. Nicole I bet is quite happy over there ( don't bother to ask me why is she happy, it's our secret.. shh...). Then when Nicole went back, I started gossiping ( XD) with Chye Yee. Then I caught some teachers staring at me. Uncomfortable, I changed my place. Nice one, directly below the fan, so cooling! Oh ya, Nicole did mention that she's gonna kill me, when ar? XD

I don't know why is my trophy is on the meja sembahyang. Haha. Anyway, stand up proud and tall because I am good~~ XD

Happiness = Priceless

2011-03-26T19:32:00.002+08:00

Had few things that happened today. Today is our Cross Country day, so as the Funding Director of Interact Club 2011/2012, I want to raise as much money as possible and I wish we are close to the award for Best Funding in the next year's ILTMC but I'm not quite sure are we that good, because as what I can see now, it's very hard to get lots of profit, unless we make something that is completely handmade and only needs some simple "ingredient" then we can get more money but I really doubt we have the time. Even if we do, I have a feeling that only me and Nicole will be making it.

Yeah, as I said, today we had our cross country day, so we (Interact Club) are selling drinks! Got 100 Plus, Kickapoo, Pepsi and Chrysanthemum Tea. I was suppose to lead the sale but my sport house teacher insisted that I have to run, so Siew Ying, Kean Jhun, Sam and a couple of form 5 interactors help me out, so when I came back I don't know where to start, so I let them carry on with what they are doing, don't wanna mess up the system.

Out of my expectation at all! The drinks were selling like hot cakes! Should've have more faith in myself. The first to sold out is 100 plus, follow by Pepsi and Kickapoo. Apparently everyone loves soda more. The Chrysanthemum was selling quite slow, and we had to carry it around and I don't know what happened and someone came and told me that they have sold everything! I feel so proud! The profit wasn't much but at least it's a profit! Reached our aim, which is RM 30+. Have to make more event, to earn money. I love my dad now! DAD, I KNOW IT'S HARD TO SUPPORT LIVINGS NOW!

Anyway, I got lucky draw! It's nothing big but I've always low on the luck when it comes to these sort of things. So YIPPY!! And I've finished the run, walk half of the route but who cares! Let's just wish that we'll have better events coming.

Laziness always wins...

2011-03-20T01:38:00.002+08:00

Hey, I just realized that this is the 100th post in my blog. It's funny how long it takes to get so much post. Well, I wasn't an active blogger for the last 2 years. Let's just say you'll be seeing more of me nowadays.

I've finish copying my BM folio but I'm suppose to edit it today, twist the words a bit so that teacher won't throw my papers in the bin. But I haven't done a thing! But it okay, the dateline is 31st of March so, yeah I guess it's still okay to procrastinate a bit.

I hate this man. People are fighting the wrong people. I feel that I'm kinda in a situation that is going to make everyone fail. My people are fighting each other when we are suppose to cooperate to compete with others. We are here to serve the same propose, why are we fighting between us?

Actually, nobody wants to fight with the one who is fighting the hardest now. He started a war while nobody thought of starting one! Oh, never mind. I'll do my part and try to say what is need to be said. If things can't be solve this way, ah! I'll just close my eyes and do my part and stay away. But can't he just be a bit more cooperative?

I wonder why I'm the only one who always repeat the same topic again and again while some others can just push it to a side and started to wonder about something else. How do they do that? I wonder if I can ever do that. Like the above matter, I've spoken about this to my family, my friends, yet I want to talk about this here. What's the matter with me? Why won't I be tired of repeating?

Changing the topic once more. I sometimes feel that my friends sometimes exclude me in some things that they do together. Why? Sometimes many things happen and I wish that I'm there but nobody seems to care to include me in , in such activities. Am I such a fun sucker? I want to have fun too sometimes, but just don't let me sit there wasting my time or I'll say something that will really make me a fun sucker.

Biography

2011-03-18T17:29:00.003+08:00

Thought of writing a biography of myself, because I saw this "Didn't know writing about myself is so difficult" on my everlasting sister's msn personal message. So let's get started.

( Oh shoot.. It's really hard.. How to compose the beginning?)

My name is Tan Wan Teng. I sometimes too do write my name is Jasmine, but I rarely use it, I'm just not used to it. I have 4 wonderful older sister and of course, my mom and dad. I can assure you that there's nothing I love more than my family. Family matters the most to me. But I do favor one of my sister than the others, which is my third sister, Wan Cheng because she is the one who is most alike to me. She is to me, a kind of person that sometimes some people won't found in life, she knows me the best. But not to be unfair to other sister, I do love them as much.

Being educated in a strict chinese school, I consider myself to be very disciplined and rational. Although not in every moment I made the right choice but I do try my hardest to do so. I'm in my teenage year, so I now is also quite self conscious about my appearance and my attitude towards my friends, but now I'm trying not to let it get carried away. Despite being from a chinese school, I've now gave up my chinese language, as I am really not interested. I've always thought that I'm quite bright even though I'm not quite good in my studies when I'm standard 1 until 4 but after a while I start to know what does the qualities to score in Malaysia examinations. But I'm having quite some problem understanding now that I'm in form 4. I've tried to be more hard working than the previous years, but I can't seems to get my attention sharp enough to process what I've learn this year, at least not as well as the previous years.

I have wonderful friends, although sometimes I do whine about them because they didn't understand me as well as my third sister do, but I do love them. So, I don't mind if they whine about me too. I've learn to accept the fact that people, no matter how much they love each other, they do talk about them. But I mean no harm when I'm talking about them, merely to express my frustration. I"m trying to live up to the values that I hold, and not to leave any regrets. Even though so, I hardly have any regrets, because I know that everything happens for a reason and it had made me who I am today, the me that feels good about herself.

I've always love to have furry friends with me. By my mean of furry friends means animals, I don't mean hairy dudes, but of course I hold no prejudice towards them. I want to be a fine veterinarian, and open a animal hospital if that is possible. I want to get a scholarship to the finest veterinary university. I wish good futures for the animals, wild or stray or pampered.

I'm known to be the stubborn one. I can be too ambitious sometimes, and sometimes bossy. I'm trying my best to improve my weakness, but I do hope to have some help from my friends. And I also love to being the best out of my friends, out of anyone.

That's all that I can do, now. So this is my biography. Might do it next time, when the time comes. It will be better. Thanks!

ILTMC

2011-03-15T00:24:00.003+08:00

Just came back from the Interact Leadership Training & Motivational Camp. I got cough right before this camp, by the time I go to the camp, my voice is already half gone. After a while, now I have no voice left, I don't know why, it doesn't hurt but I don't have voice. I'm so sad, I can't sing, I can't even talk!

I wonder had I scare of some other school people with my voice. It's kinda scary. I want my old voice back! I want to sing. I'm so sad I can't participate in the "Interact got Talent" part where my school sing Love Story due to my sexy voice. All I can do is the Thailand transexual voice to entertain people.

Lots of VI and MBS leng zhai there but all like a bit, what should I describe? Dog in heat. Precisely! Keep flirting with girls. They all playing (all the other school and Teo Gi and Chin and Amos and Calvin and Hon Yong) Truth or Dare. All the dares are like kiss on the cheek, hug with opposite sex, watching them is kinda like watching people having one night stand, tengok orang memuaskan nafsu diri. I felt bored, I go to bed. =)

I felt that lots of guys quite interested in Nicole! Nicole, don’t fight with me when you see this. Most of the time people got wooed by people is the only one who don’t realize. Guys tends to find her to chat but not any other girls(except Teo Gi) to chat. Whatever la, they made a bad impression to me already.

The place is hot and full of monkeys! The monkey came invading our dormitory’s trash(where we throw our pads XD) for food. The water is so yellow that it stained my morning towel to earthy colour. Argh, hate that part. Found Wen Yi in the camp! Same rank with me, and she changed a lot since standard 3. Haha, of course.

Nice sight by the way, of all the leng zhai. Memuaskan pandangan saya. But not interested at all. Haha, epic fail leh guys! Everyone dance and sing together(although I can’t sing), one word, FUN! I love dancing, someday, I’ll go learn it! XD

I love having these long post, it makes me feel like my blog is very nice. XD Anyway, there’s also some unhappy things happening then , so I’m gonna find someone to bitch about it! XD Good Night everyone!

When we get too stubborn

2011-02-27T01:23:00.002+08:00

Don't you just hate it when people suddenly stares at you angrily at you? Wondering what the heck have you done to piss them off. It makes no sense to you right? It makes no sense for people to be angry at you for something that you DON"T KNOW! Don't you just love that teacher kept saying "I won't scold you if it's wrong", how nice if it can be applied to real life. People will always be ready to forgive your little mistakes.

But they don't. I should too, but it's hard. You should too, but I know, it's hard.

If you were in the "secretary" situation, you'll know what I mean. Stop denying, yes, I'm talking about you. Someone bitch too much last time, and it made me think. We are such an asshole! Blaming someone that doesn't know what "sin" he/she had done! How would you expect someone to change or even feel sorry if he don't know he just hurt someone?

Seriously, I'm gonna be a man! I will do what MATURE people will do! Instead of sitting and whining about her little acts, I'm gonna tell her all about it. I'm gonna tell her what she did, what's her blind spot! As much as it's going to hurt her, I will make sure she'll feel better! She IS a nice person, a nice friend when not much people is around! As you all know that she loves attention, stop being mean to her then she is normal, when she wasn't with so many people. Don't be angry at someone tak tentu pasal!

Really, I think that we are so narrow minded. It will get back to us one day.

Brotherhood

2011-02-21T21:31:00.003+08:00

I know that it is freakin' weird to see this word in a girl with only sisters in her family appears in this blog. But seems like I've join the boys too much and they (Eric actually) calls me a boy without hesitations. But I think it's nothing wrong with it because boys, sometimes are in fact better than girls to hang out with.

I now have no problem offering my fist to Kean Jhun or Chin or Chye Yee(not Eric, he use his whole force to hit my fist). I can easily flip my chair over and start gossiping ( most of the time not entertained because KJ was never a gossip fan). I can just suddenly run over someone's place and smack them in the back. I wonder am I going too far. Nah, I feel better. =)

But being so boyish many bring some consequence. For example, I hurt my lips today while trying to push KJ, then my stupid bottle happens to be in the perfect position to knock my lips. My lips now suffers internal bleeding ( no biggie). It's my own fault anyway, haha.

But don't you guys worry for me! I'm definitely still a girl! At least I don't THINK like a guy. I just act like one. I'm still wondering am I the most girly(in heart) one among all my sisters?

Totally Random Stuff

2011-02-15T00:13:00.003+08:00

I've just realize, the more personal or funny or informal the post is, more likely you guys will comment. If the post is like my freakin' sudden thoughts, there's actually nothing to comment. =D

Today wear my long-time-didn't-wear long sleeve shirt and skirt to school. This skirt is actually tighter than any other skirt of mine so my perut buncit was quite obvious. Haha! Anyway, there's quite a lot of comment about it from my friends, and they're not necessarily bad stuff.

Comment number 1: From Teo Gi, She said that I actually look slimmer in that skirt because it's tight. REALLY? XD

Comment number 2: I've forgotten from who, said that I walk more lady-like today because of the skirt. It restrict my steps.

Comment number 3: From Eric, He said that I look more mature wearing this. More "woman" as he said.

Comment number 4: From Azfar, He said that I look like Lee in this uniform! Ha!

If I ever become President of Librarian Board (cross finger!) I'll wear this on meetings so that I got the "shadow" of Lee! XD

Oh, Just Shut Up.

2011-02-13T01:10:00.003+08:00

Sometimes some song which describes exactly how you feels (please not love songs) can suddenly turn so cool. This song does so too. Look at the purple word to see my today's real message.

Sara Bareilles: King Of Anything

Keep drinking coffee, stare me down across the table
While I look outside
So many things I’d say if only I were able
But I just keep quiet and count the cars that pass by

You’ve got opinions, man
We’re all entitled to ‘em, but I never asked
So let me thank you for your time, and try not to waste anymore of mine
And get out of here fast

I hate to break it to you babe, but I’m not drowning
There’s no one here to save

Who cares if you disagree?
You are not me
Who made you king of anything?
So you dare tell me who to be?
Who died and made you king of anything?

You sound so innocent, all full of good intent
Swear you know best
But you expect me to jump up on board with you
And ride off into your delusional sunset

I’m not the one who’s lost with no direction
But you’ll never see

You’re so busy making maps with my name on them in all caps
You got the talking down, just not the listening

Who cares if you disagree?
You are not me
Who made you king of anything?
So you dare tell me who to be?
Who died and made you king of anything?

All my life I’ve tried to make everybody happy
While I just hurt and hide
Waiting for someone to tell me it’s my turn to decide

Who cares if you disagree?
You are not me
Who made you king of anything?
So you dare tell me who to be?
Who died and made you king of anything?

Who cares if you disagree?
You are not me
Who made you king of anything?
So you dare tell me who to be?
Who died and made you king of anything?

Let me hold your crown, babe.

Overloaded

2011-02-10T23:23:00.002+08:00

5 weekday, 6-7 after school activities. Have to live in the school already. Everyone claims that they are very nice because it's only one or 2 hours, but they don't know that's what everyone do, so everyone x one-two hour(s) = infinity. Wow! What an equation!

Homework berkeliaran, I mean bertaburan. Always had this problem : look at my pink planner for the homework that need to be pass up tomorrow, but when I'm keeping my beg then I go " OH SHOOT! STILL GOT THIS HOMEWORK!". Dislike endless homework.

Folio is coming too. Have to do it some day some.

ILTMC(Interact Leadership Training Motivational Camp) is coming soon too, right before the folio's due date. So I have to finish it asap.

If the rumah sukan terkena Thursday, I don't know if I got the time to replace, some more I'm trying to impress the senior to take notice of me to increase the chance of me becoming the next president.

Sejarah have to study everything myself because teacher is enjoying her own voice but nobody else in the class does. Add math have to work extra hard because I'm not good in it. Thank god that we have En. Zambri for civic, he always makes my day better. I love pn. Chua too, so cute.

Can mosquito stop sucking me? Very itchy liao.

Happy Chinese New Year!

2011-01-31T01:47:00.002+08:00

Chinese New Year is coming, but unfortunately for form 4 is not really that fun, because the homework we get might even be more than the angpau we get. Anyway, I'm glad and happy that Chinese New Year is here, because apart from the holiday, I love that all of my sisters are at home. It's always nice.

As the year of Rabbit is approaching, the supermarket starting with a C near my house had a rather ridiculous "decoration" at it's supermarket entrance. They put a rabbit(which I think is maybe only 2 week old as my neighbor who rears rabbit taught me who to differentiate) there! The irst time I saw baby rabbit is I think the first few days it's there, it's eating and I saw lots of poops so I think it was frighten. The second time was a few days later, where the rabbit stays only in a conner of the cage. The urine and poop concentrate only at that conner so I think again that it's still frighten and decided to stay at that conner, further to people. Third time, a few days ago, it hid his head at the back of this food and water container, which I think that it is starting to get depress. I disagree to put any animal in these position.

Mummy buy my idea of not changing our family's traditions of having steamboat on Chinese New Year Eve(I said I am a good sales person.=)). So prepare for it! XD Going to decorate our house a bit and snap some photo for moral. It's stupid isn't it? Taking photos as evidence that you have done your duty as a daughter? Oh, come on..

Anyway, I wish y'all have a very super- duper happy chinese new year!

Self-doubt

2011-01-29T23:49:00.003+08:00

I'm sure everyone doubt themselves. Don't you just hate that feeling? It's like you felt as if you did something wrong. I hate it, a lot.

Even thought I tried to re-ensure myself, but still I felt the aura from my surrounding. How people talk and react to things, it's different now. It's hard to stop the voice in the head.

Don't make anyone doubt themselves. Anyway, what is wrong about feeling good about yourself? Why do you have to make someone feel not-so-good about them? I like to compliment myself, like I admit that I'm a good salesman, I am friendly and I can sing(no matter what people says now.). I let myself acknowledge them, and I feel better. Do it, let it be your strength, even thought it might not be, but if you have faith in yourself, it will be. Don't be shy to yourself or anyone, the things that we should be ashamed of are definitely not being perasan or unable to talk properly in front of an audience or not having the prefect body.

Self-doubt, it's so destructive. It eats you inside out and burns you alive. That is why people kept getting depress. I am happy when I know that I am what I want to be, and that is to be happy and live a meaningful life, but when this fellow comes in and tell you, you are wrong, it makes people unhappy. Dislike.

It ain't cool and it ain't good.

Morrie

2011-01-28T23:26:00.002+08:00

Cheng last time found a book in our house, saying that she was planning to buy it but she found one at home instead, but she didn't bring back to Kampar, so I read it first.

Tuesdays With Morrie is a really great, inspiring and touching book. It started from a student visiting his old, sick professor. And the ending of the book is the death of Morrie. It's a real person, search youtube for Morrie Schwartz to see the real Morrie. I cried when he died like I've just lost a friend. How often do you get that feeling.

There is lots of quote that I took from the book, and I would like to share a couple of them.

"Don't let go too soon, but don't hang on too long." -Morrie Schwartz-

"Accept the past as past, without denying it or discarding it." - Morrie Schwartz-

"Love each other or perish." -W.H. Auden, Morrie's favorite poet-

What would you do if you know that you are going to die soon?

Emotions

2011-01-23T19:23:00.002+08:00

I've realize that in my blog, among all the blog post, they are mostly about my daily life, my happiness, whines and complains, "intellectual" stuff, sadness, but not emo. There might be some sad ones but not emo. Even if there is, it might be only a few. Maybe it's just me. Because emo for me it's more like self-pity.

Of course, like any other human, I do feel sorry for myself from time to time. But it's just I always forgotten to post it here. LOL. But what makes all the difference from these that made it here is it doesn't last. I mean the feeling, the sorry you feel, unlike the happiness you get from the little present you get from a friend, no it doesn't stay. And I wouldn't want it to stay anyway, so I won't post it here. I won't record it anywhere because it will remind me how bad it feels. No, I want to feel great, I want to feel like something. And when I feel like something in me, I am something.

I once posted ," I only allow myself to feel sorry for myself for 5 minutes each day, and then I'll spend the rest 23 hours and 55 minutes feeling great.". That is what I do. In fact, in somedays I don't even take that 5 minutes anymore. It's nothing wrong being pessimistic, but do you want to live your live as a optimistic or a pessimistic?

Let's talk about envious. To be honest, everyone envy someone. But most people just envy. What difference does it makes? Learn is the word. Maybe in the end you still don't get what you wanted, but what you wanted might not be the thing you want later. Find the best in you. Anything. Do good! Listen, make people feel belonged. Who knows when you're nervous on the stage, all they know is you are entertaining, and that is a good thing! Find the good in life isn't that hard.

I forgotten who said this but it said "When you're feeling sad, do good to people. " Yes, when you're feeling down, do good to others. That is the fastest solution.

Sick

2011-01-20T00:30:00.002+08:00

Can anyone buy me a Kaspasky? I kena virus ady.. No, not my computer, it's me. Yep! I'm sick, again.

How should I describe how fast that virus strike? Ah, like this. Yesterday morning I was still as fit as a fiddle. But then when I go home I felt like my throat had just been punctured by a chopstick(just to describe the size) on the left side of my throat, left side only. Then my left nasal started to produce mucus( I'm sorry if it disgust you. =D) and I was sneezing non-stop. =(

Then my left side of my throat starts to sore. Weird right? Then it came to my right side of my nose. Then my throat. =( Then mommy brought me to a clinic. All they give is super sleepy medicine that doesn't help. Well, maybe a bit.

I was thinking should I take the flu tablet today at school because I scare that I will get dizzy and sleepy. But I don't think I brought enough tissue to school so in the end I took my medicine. In result, I did get dizzy and sleepy at school. So I was a bit like a walking zombie today. =D

All I want to say is, Stupid Virus! Don't come and kakacaucau form 4 punya student la! I sick ady oso don't dare to skip class! If you're going to stay for a bit longer, MAKE SURE you make me thinner! If not, GET OUT !

Super Duper Tiring Day..

2011-01-15T01:08:00.002+08:00

Omg! Today was super tiring. Went to school late today. Kena call to the discipline room, and kena "e-Disiplin". Then surprisingly, school today wasn't that long! Anyway, I went back to Wudo. I'm so out of shape! My hands and legs are like jelly after doing only the warm up. T.T

My title of the "team leader" that I used to have in Wudo is taken, because I didn't show up for too long. Whatever. After Wudo today I was actually fatigue, but I went shopping afterwards. =D

After lunch we went to 1 Utama to shop for Chinese New Year clothes. As I still have "new clothes" in my wardrobe so I plan not to buy anything, but I do have somethings that I wish to buy, which is a top to match with one of my skirt. And I did! Check that of my list!

Shop until 8pm+ la.. Super tired ady, but still have to go to pick up my sister at the hospital that she work for. Then we went for dinner( I was already half asleep). Now I'm finally back home, cleaned myself up, blogging to tell you about my super tired day. Sorry if my language sounds something wrong. My mind isn't working that efficient, not in this state.

Moved!

2011-01-10T20:50:00.002+08:00

We finally moved to the new block! Just decorated 6 papan kenyataan! Disaster! 6 boards!

Then class is going fine. Lots of homework. Tak cukup tidur everyday...

Conclusion: A super honest student cannot survive form 4(he/she will die because lack of sleep.. =D)

P.S.: I posted my "conclusion" on Facebook, who knows so many people will go and like it! Surprise!

4 Science 1

2011-01-05T23:23:00.002+08:00

How nice.. Almost 40 student cramp in a classroom which is so small that we have to walk like a crab to get out of the class(hyperbola ady..). But look on the bright side, having only 3 fans and 36 student in the class, everyone's so hot!

I was elected to become the Ketua Keceriaan. Actually it's better if you don't give me this job, because I might get a bit carried away and imagine a classroom make over which will be to good to be true. Anyway, I'll start my job next week if confirm that there is no chance at all to change class. Comment some ways to decorate our class, like some themes( I'm think Minimalist.) and a series of color. Can we repaint our classroom? Teacher say they can supply the paint.

I'm kind of proud of myself, although it's only the 5th day of this year, but I didn't procrastinate things! Surprisingly starting early isn't that hard! Hopefully this momentum will last until forever! I love my pink planner!

There is something that I want to do this year, which includes:

#1 If I ever meet Pn Karamjit, I want to ask her to consider me as a candidate if she ever wants to find new debate team members.

#2 Do my best when I'm doing my duties at Library. (because I really, really, really want to be next year's president for the Librarian Board.)

#3 Get A for Biology everytime and if possible, get an A+!

#4 Know everyone in my class!

#5 Get one of the directors post in Interact Club instead of secretary which I consider which I would do worst in all the post.

This is the few things that is in my mind now. So #1 and #4 I have to do it as soon as possible so that I can "rest in peace" and the others are a bit more long term planning. So wish me luck!

1st Post of 2011!

2011-01-01T00:07:00.002+08:00

Happy New Year!! Actually I'm not that happy as I sound, because it means holidays is almost over! I feel like having more holiday, haha.. So anyone wants to share with me their new year resolution, feel free to comment, in fact I'm pretty interested!

If asked to say what have you done in the past 2010 that you feel is pretty good to yourself or maybe to your family and friends, all I can think of is erm.. My PMR result? I simply can't remember what I did. =) But I know it's perfectly normal. XD

What am I to do with my life next year? I love this line from this song, Life?! from Yu Heng- Thought Life is overrated, You've gotta work your way out to make it. True. But life will never feel overrated if you really did MAKE it.

So my proper 2011 New Year Resolution:

#1 Make full use of my planner.

#2 Make my Biology as strong as a 1000-year-old tree!

#3 Be more active in co-curriculum, class activities and library activities.

#4 Smile even more and be friendly.

#5 Practice proactive and win-win.

#6 Don't whine during duties.

#7 Eat better and healthier and less. =)

#8 Try to drink 2 liters of water per day.

#9 Get involve more in the coming IU day.

#10 Be more helpful wherever I am.

#11 Do more random good acts/deeds.

#12 Be nothing less.

Wish you guys had fun reading my past posts and be so loyal to my blog! Happy New Year. I will make next year awesome. =)

Kampar, Here I come!

2010-12-25T00:28:00.002+08:00

Going to Ipoh( Palo) on Christmas Day! And I'm going just with my dear mom! How sweet! Gonna spend Christmas with my Eldest Aunty(Dua Yi, Hokkien lai de)'s house as she celebrates Christmas. I should be packing right now but you know I like to procrastinate things right?

And after that I'm going to live with my sister, Wan Cheng in the house in Kampar on either 26th or 27th. I love Kampar. So fun yet relaxing. And I like the huge Tesco there! I love going to super markets!

So the next time I'm gonna update my dear blog will be either when I'm in Kampar or when I come home.. So don't miss me!

Thoughts

2010-12-23T13:18:00.001+08:00

I was thinking just now. Mirror don't really have a reflection of itself isn't it? I mean the mirror itself cannot see or reflects itself right? And even if you put a mirror in front of the mirror, still you will only see more mirror. Mirror in a mirror.

What a funny little thing, mirrors.

Say The Magic Word, Congratulations!

2010-12-23T12:44:00.002+08:00

Finally the day had come. The more I think about it, the worst my imaginations got. Thinking back to the days I had my exams, Oh shoot, I might get a C for my BC, oh shit, I might get B for my KH and BM! Stop thinking about it!!

So this morning, I get up really early, even took my bath and I was shivering non-stop. Then on the way to school, I was rather relaxer than when I was trying to sleep last night, due to unusual bed time I can't seems to fall asleep and after I was asleep I kept waking up because of the nerves.

So I got to school, surprisingly almost 90% of the students were in uniforms. Then I thought you're so getting your ass kick by me, chin! So anyway, it's nice to see my friends again. And while waiting for our results, I was rather uncomfortable without Nicole and Siew Ying around me. Even thought I've got other friends with me but I just don't feel belonged.

Anyway, just skip the uncomfortable part, finally the time has come! But were starting with a stupid bad news. All students with Jeans are not allowed to take their results. Although I wasn't affected because I wasn't wearing a jeans but I feel very uncomfortable without my uniform because of the stupid rules.

Eric who was wearing a knee length pants were too not allowed to get his certificate. But he don't really seems to mind all of that, but he did managed to get his result, which I bet was straight A. Oh ya, I forgotten to mention about my result. Are you ready? (Drumroll)

I got only a B for my Chinese, and A for all others! Later going to McD to celebrate.

And I took a peek at Nicole's and Siew Ying's result. Guess what? Nicole got straight A! And Siew Ying's result is 2B and 6A!! Congratulations!

Chin too got straight A, and I can see that he is over the Pluto happy.. XD Kean Jhun got same as me, but he isn't really satisfied. Anyway, I love my result.

Reading... Pondering...

2010-12-21T01:46:00.002+08:00

Finally able to use this word, ponder, taught by my eldest sister, to let Facebook be more educating. =) Anyway, in order to make my plan of making Siew Ying's life better(Nah! I just want to do something..) in my mind to work, I have to finish a book real quick so that I can lend her my book. It's still a secret so, shhh....

So, as I read, I came across with a line which I think about it and simply ponder about it. This is the line, "It doesn't matter how fast you're going or how nice you look if you're going to the wrong direction.".

So, I came up with something like this,

Life is like a race, except for the competition part. You see, everyone want to do their best and be all they can be. If you fall, the crowd will encourage you to get up and finish the race. Sometimes in making huge decisions, are just like someone blind folded you at the start of the race, you don't know which way to go, to go front or back? Most of the time, your friends, your spectators will often point you the right way to go, but only those who wants to see you make fun of yourself will point the wrong way to go. You see, if someone makes a bad choice and still acts as if it's so darn cool, it's like running opposite to where the finish line is and even if you run beautifully or fastest of all, everyone will laugh about you and treat you as a joke. Of course, it's never too late to turn around and go the right way. The finish line is always waiting for you.

I just want to share this. Haha.. Like it or not, it's up to you to judge. But I think when I'm older and I find this post and I will smack my head and say "Silly me.." But still, preferable, leave me a comment.

And everyone, ponder once in a while. =) Cause, I love pondering.

Sewing

2010-12-20T04:03:00.002+08:00

Helped Lee with her project. She had to make a model Jacko( MJ + Gecko, a character created by Lee, question of her project.) and unfortunately I am the nearest person to her that knows how to sew and how (theory only.. theory only..) to make clothes. So I spend almost half a day doing nothing else but sew Jacko a top and a jacket.

The top looks like what Dobby from Harry Potter wears, yup, exactly a pillowcase. anyway, there will be a jacket covering it so it doesn't matter that much. Anyway, making the top wasn't hard, The real pain-in-the-ass is the jacket.

The jacket was alright. Because the model was in a awkward position(sorry Lee!) and Lee requested some wire(to make it "float") at some place and some place extra long. Omg, I can't believe that I actually made it! Not the best thing in the world be it's a jacket!

Ah, my first handmade clothes had given to Jacko. If there is chance, I'll snap some picture and post it up here.

To Nanami: If you are serious about stop posting new post on your blog, I'll say keep posting, even if it's only craps..

To Chris: Don't delete your blog la.. It's nice. =) And I like to read your blog. Not messed up..

To myself: Why is everyone stop posting on their blog? Whose blog am I going to read when now I'm so addicted to reading people's blog?

Nice Song

2010-12-19T02:17:00.002+08:00

I've just discover a pretty nice song called Baby, it's cold outside, thanks to my cousin Jeamy for posting a video of him singing this duet on Facebook. And I found a video of Glee singing this song so here is the link to it.

And if you like to sing along like I do, here is the lyrics.

I really can't stay
(but baby it's cold outside)
I've got to go away
(but baby it's cold outside)
This evening has been
(been hoping that you'd drop in)
So very nice
(i'll hold your hands, they're just like ice)
My mother will start worry
(beautiful whats your hurry)
My father will be pacing the floor
(listen to the fireplace roar)
So really i'd better scurry
(beautiful please don't hurry)
but maybe just a half a drink more
(put some records on while i pour)
the neighbors might faint
(baby it's bad out there)
say what's in this drink
(no cabs to be had out there)
i wish i knew how
(your eyes are like starlight now)
to break this spell
(i'll take your hat, your hair looks swell)
i ought to say "no, no, no sir"
(mind if i move in closer)
at least i'm gonna say that i tried
(what's the sense in hurtin' my pride)
i really can't stay
(oh baby don't hold out)

both:Oh but it's cold out side

i've gotta get home
(but baby you'd freeze out there)
say lend me a coat
(it's up to your knees out there)
you've really been grand
(i thrill when you touch my hand)
but don't you see?
(how can you do this thing to me?)
there's bound to be talk tomorrow
(think of my lifelong sorrow)
at least there will be plenty implied
(if you got namonia and died)
i really can't stay
(get over that old out)

both: Oh but it's cold outside

Enjoy.. =)

Spaghetti

2010-12-18T01:55:00.002+08:00

I had spaghetti for dinner today! Now, before you say "SO?", I'll tell you this, it's rare for me to have spaghetti except when my parents are out, so it's special for me. =)

I suck in proportioning. I end up cooking almost a 2 person meal. My own creation called Prawn and Carrot Tomato cooked with curry powder Spaghetti. =) It's not awesome but it ok. =) And guess what I finish it all!

I'm glad that people like the painting that I did on the last post so I will be painting a forest with a balloon smiley there, and if possible before this holiday ends.

For family and friends that voted on the pole, thank you! =) Stay tuned, bye!

Completed!

2010-12-17T02:59:00.004+08:00

I loveeeeeeee blogging. Don't you too? No? Oh, too bad.. =) For me I love blogging.. It's almost like talking to a friend. Don't you think when you blog you always write to somebody to read? I'm a talkative person so blogging it's like somehow talking to myself and it's essential for me during holiday because all my friends are not with me so it's very hard for me to shut up. So ya! Blog means quite a lot for me. =)

Anyway, what is complete you might be wondering? You see, since last year I have been thinking of things to do that I feel that will help me becoming a better human being, whether it's in organizing, being more responsible or just to improved my personally. So I have a black papered book which I call it my Quote Book, but it does more than just keeping my all-time favorite quote, I write some of the things I suddenly want to do(just to record so that I won't forget) like 15 Things I Want to Accomplish Before Tertiary Education and another list which is 15 Things I Want to Accomplish Before 30, and it contains much more like a list of names I want for my children( I know it's a weird thing to do but there are a few names that I really like but I always forgot them). So one of the item on the "15 Things I Want to Accomplish Before Tertiary Education" which is #3- To complete an impressive (to me) paint drawing.

I suddenly wanted to paint with water color(after watching Lee doing her homework). So today I did paint a painting but I used some poster color because there wasn't enough light blue and white water color left. So I painted a sky view which was a picture I took in one of the train station in UK.

Ah, this is the photo I was talking about. So I painted this thinking that this would be a easy subject. Apparently not. It still took me hours to complete it and the result wasn't THAT nice. Anyway, it's the best PAINTING I've ever done. So I think I can cross #3 off my list then.

Here! This is the one I painted.. If you look carefully you can see the different shades in the cloud. Not the best in town but are you impressed? Well, it impressed me! #3 is out of the list. =)

Happy

2010-12-16T00:57:00.002+08:00

Just watch Repunzel with mummy today! It's awesome! Watch it if you have time.

Anyway, the new finally reveals the date to release PMR result! Confirm on the 23rd already. We'll see how it goes by then. Dengar khabar we can go to get our result starting on 10am. Who ever that reads my blog, lets go there at 10! =)

That's all for now. Bye! =D

10 Days

2010-12-14T00:56:00.002+08:00

I didn't realize how close it is until facebook told me(lol, I mean my friends post it on facebook.) It's 10 days to the day I finally get my result!

I'm not sure is it 23rd or 28th but I heard from my friend that it's on the 23rd, because one of the friend's mom works for the Ministry of Education wo. Anyway, Siew Ying, I hope to meet you there, what ever that is going on that day, I don't care! You must come or else I'll take your result and burn it especially if you got good result! =D

Although for sure I won't get a straight As(because I was tricked to take my chinese.=(), but I'm quite concern about my BM because my usual result in school also very unstable, always jumping on A and B. Wish me luck! =D

I was hoping to get my result sooner, I can't wait any longer. =D I hope to see my teachers there too, I want to see their expression! Ha! Classmates! Remember to show me your result on that day and if better show me your tears! I'll bring my camera there! =)

All the best for everyone, even those who aren't getting their result such as egg yolk green. =)

Baking Failed

2010-12-11T00:05:00.002+08:00

My cake didn't work out. =( When I was beating the eggs and the sugar it seems perfect, but when I put in the flour I made a terrible mistake. I beat it with the mixer instead of folding it in. When I start beating, it all became watery. T.T

Thinking what have I done?! I call mummy for help, then she ask me to put in 50g more flour but I only put in 30g because the weight of the sugar and the flour should be the same but the sugar only weighs 90g so I don't dare to change the recipe that much. I put in extra bicarbonate of soda, luckily I did, if not I think what would be coming out of the oven will be a cookie.

So my "sponge cake" turn out to be something like a pancake. It's really not what a cake should look like, I mean have you seen a 2cm thick cake? Omg, the most disappointing cake I've ever baked. It's ok, I'll learn from mistake. =)

Coming Soon

2010-12-10T00:33:00.002+08:00

What's coming soon? My coffee sponge cake! I'm going to bake it tomorrow morning while waiting for Cheng to come home! I promised her that the cake will be welcoming her. =)

One of my goals for next year(new on the list!) is to drink 2 liters of water everyday! So ambitious! For me drinking water isn't fun at all, I used to drink about >1 liter per day. So since yesterday I kept counting how much water have I drank. Mummy asked me why I kept drinking water nowadays? My answer is simple, to provide my body with all the water it needs. =) Drinking 2 liters per day to me needs extra effort. So hopefully it will become my new habit and continue to be my habit through 2011 and the years that follows.

What else is coming soon? My PMR result of course! I can't wait to see how is my result, hopefully my hard work(I did work hard, you cool with that? =)) did pay off and hopefully I will get an A for my BM. I'm looking forward to see that will I cry on that day. I want to bring my camera and feel proud that day. I'm still wondering about the release date, is it 23rd or 28th?

I need luck for everything! Who will refuse to be lucky? =)

What do you want to do before you die?

2010-12-08T23:58:00.004+08:00

A reality show on 8 tv recently called The Buried Life. I love this show. One of the reality show that really earn earns people's respect.

Basically, the show is about 4 guys on a purple bus called Penelope, on a mission to cross off 100 things to do before they die. Only the introduction of the show is enough to keep you watching it. And for every thing they accomplish they do something for others.

Click http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GrzWS7&feature=related to watch the trailer.

Other than that, I have not much to say. Being at home for so long can be boring. Feeling so unproductive everyday. Anyway, please do vote for the pole under the "follower". =)

Visit to the National Art Gallery

2010-12-07T01:04:00.017+08:00

I went to the National Art Gallery today. The gallery itself wasn't very disappointing but if compared with the one we went in UK, there are less exhibitions there but I think the ones in Malaysia are nicer, better and more interesting. Most of it shows the cultural details in their work.

What was disappointing was the library we went into. We went to the art gallery's library and it shifted from upstairs to downstairs so there are almost nothing there. Just a few racks of files and a few racks of encyclopedias. But my sister photostat some documents there(actually it's not some, it's a lot) and it's really cheap compare to anywhere else! They even offers student price!

It's really not a bad place to visit if you want to spend 2 or 3 hours doing something "artistic", and it's almost empty most of the time! But there is lots of security guards there. =) Photos are not allowed but I did took some photos quietly so enjoy.. It's quite blur but better than nothing. =)

In the library, Upper floor.

The stairs and the encyclopedias.

The lower floor.

Finally in the gallery.

I personally love this.

From inside of one of the exhibit, it's a wooden house. Very nice.

Interior of the wooden house, those are fake cupcakes.

It doesn't look that nice in the photo, but if you are there it looks very nice.

So this is it. Enjoy! And remember to vote for the pole right below the "followers". Thank you for your cooperation.

Vote =)

2010-12-05T23:41:00.002+08:00

I've made a vote here in this blog. It's just right below the followers. Please vote. =) Thank you.

I'm going to the art gallery tomorrow with Wan Lee. She is going to the art gallery library to finish her assignment or project. I don't know which. Anyway, she ask me to accompany her so yeah, I'm going there tomorrow.

Hoping for something nice there. I don't know if I will die of boredom there if I didn't get to walk around the gallery. Mummy said I might need to spend half of the day there and my sister will be doing her project so I'm on my own, I don't know if I can entertain myself for the half of the day with books.

I'll update on you guys when I come back from there. Hopefully it's nice. =)

Active Blogging

2010-12-04T02:05:00.002+08:00

I've notice that people don't blog so often as they did. Maybe that's because I check everyone's blog everyday. Hahaha.. Nicole finally restart her blog. Why do I say REstart? Because she do have a blog but she had abandoned her blog for a year plus. So now, Nicole welcome! =)

I last month memang giat blogging la... It is quite emotionally and physically straining... Hahaha.. Who ask me to promise to post 30 post for that month. Hopefully I won't stop blogging when school starts.

I don't know why but I am really wishing that school starts earlier. I know that I will really want holiday when school do start, but I don't seems to enjoy the holiday as much as my friends. Everything is so routine.

Starting of the year always feels great to me. New teacher, new classroom, "new" classmates, new experiences awaits. In the opposite, I don't really like end of the year, you'll need to leave old friends, the dusty classroom and the friendly old teacher, not to mention the old science notes.

I can feel the chinese new year feel coming and school.=) And Christmas too! If you have the money, buy me a Nikon D3100. =) And I just realize that I can actually afford to buy it myself but I won't buy it now. I'm still a child, aren't I? =) But I swear, someday I will own you, DSLR, you hear me? I'll own you!

Refreshments

2010-12-02T00:44:00.002+08:00

Like my new background? You know why I use this as my background? Because I drew a sunset kinda similar to this. =) But it was much more orange in my drawing.

So, today I went war at Jusco Maluri with mummy and daddy because there's members sales today. You'll get to redeem cash voucher after every RM100. So I finally got my Herbal Essences today!! It smells so nice!! Can't wait to try it!

Jusco is just so smart, buat patterns so attract customers. People are shopping like everything is free, lol. But I hate shopping in places that are very crowded. Those aunty like don't know how to use a trolley, kept banging my hip. And those aunty shouting at their phone, like "big brothers"(dai gor).

I wanna work out but seems to be too lazy to do that. XD Paiseh. And I wanna bake a sponge cake too but I'm also too lazy to do that. I miss school but I know I'll miss the holiday when I back at school so trying to enjoy it while I can but haiz....

Hmm... Tell me, will I be prettier as I grow up? XD Suddenly ask random question to people.

Mission Completed!

2010-11-30T22:52:00.002+08:00

I have completed my wish to post 30 post in this month! =)

Nice. Good experience, I post so many post so some I've even forgotten what I wrote. XD Anyway, it feels good . =)

Try it if you have the time. XD Bye!

Bring Me the Cinema

2010-11-30T21:03:00.002+08:00

Usually by this time of the year, lots of nice movie are in the cinema. It's near Christmas. And I have lots of movie I want to watch.=)

The social network! I watch the talk show late night, hosted by Baki and Mike(I don't know who the hell is Mike anyway...=)). Well, according to them, The Social Network is really really nice. I'm so tempted to watch it.

Next, I want to watch Repunzel! I love disney cartoon! =D Except for Enchanted XD. So I wanna watch that too.

Then, I wanna watch Lelio Popo! It seems nice la. =) Baki said it's nice. So bring the cinema to me! Better if you bring me all the DVD including the Unstoppable!

Egg yolk green, lets go watch movie! =D

Shame

2010-11-30T00:34:00.003+08:00

Who have been asked before what is your most shameful memory or experience? Well, I have, but most of the time I lied or just refuse to say anything. So today, I think it's time for me to face my shame.

It happened when I was in standard 2. The teacher wasn't my usual teacher. My usual teacher wasn't available that day. I used to admire this teacher, well because he was one of the younger teacher at my school that time. But not anymore after this.

He was giving our work books back. He thought that he was very funny and at that time, I thought so too. He was calling people funny names, and have them to come out and get their books. I remember that time he call Tatiana T.T., that's why Tash end up having toilet tissue as her nickname.

So I tried to be funny, I hid under the table waiting for my turn and finally it came, which I now I wished that teacher lost my book that time. I crawled out from my table and towards him to get my book. But when I went there he refuse to give me my book. Then he said,"Why are you crawling? Are you a dog? My class don't have a dog. And a dog don't need this book."

All I wanted to do was entertain my classmate as what he was doing! And how can a TEACHER talk to a 8 year old like that?! From that moment I hate this teacher like hell.

The class when from noisy to silent, everyone know something is terribly wrong. He finally gave me my book back and I walk to my sit and sat down. I acted as if I was looking for something in my beg while I cried(I have a habit of this during primary school, until I know that people knows that I am crying while I'm doing that). I can't remember if the class continued to laugh.

So until now I sometimes feels a bit odd when people say things like "I'm your dog.=)" although I know perfectly that they are joking. And I kind of blame this teacher that I don't really dare to be funny anymore until these few years.

These might be nothing to some people but this is really a big thing for me. For this to happen to me at what I consider to be my most unstable age leaves a really big mark. To be honest I'm crying now cause this really hurts. And the reason for me to write this here is to remove that mark. Maybe if I know that someone out there understand how I felt, I can face this memory again and again without shame.

This is not my fault. ;)

Nicole's Party.

2010-11-29T16:17:00.002+08:00

Well, not as I expect it to be, but ya, it's a success.=)

What was totally unexpected was I suddenly got a fever on that morning. =( I didn't get to sleep till noon(usually I sleep until 3pm, but that day I slept until 12pm only.) . Although I've heal from the fever but I still don't know what cause it.

Everyone who said they will come came. Eric's present wrapping was simple( what I mean by simple is really simple, just a green paper and cover the content and he didn't even make another card for the wishes, he just write on the green paper.). I shared present with Siew Ying.

Siew Ying brought her guitar. We bbq that night. Damn Kean Jhun kept saying that I don't know how to bbq. I was bbqing a fish and to be honest I really don't know how but there is always first time right? In the end my fish is perfectly cooked and not burned! But the Kean Jhun who claimed that he even bbq a fish before burn what else, a sausage. Ha! What a cook.

We played with water that day. Although I was fever but I did play with water(a bit la...). Nicole's youngest sister seems to be the one who was having the most fun. And she seems a bit more fond with me. =)

Well, that's all I think. Good job to Nicole and her family. =)

In my dream

2010-11-27T01:03:00.002+08:00

Yesterday night(this morning actually), I dreamt of my old house. =D Happy! Cause I love my old house and I didn't "went" into the house for a year plus(I think so) so I'm glad that I did sleep until noon today(when am I not? lol). =)

Anyway, dreams are unrealistic, impossible and not logic. So let me take you to the world of impossible!

At first, I was in my parents room, looking out of the clear window. There's something on the roof of my neighbor. Hmmm, what is that? Black, big, Chimpanzee? Oh my god no, it's a hippopotamus! What the hell is a hippo doing on someone's roof?!

I turn around when my dad came into the room and I told him that I just saw a hippo on our neighbor's roof. Then he walk towards me when I turn back to the window and saw that hippo on our balcony! I was shock (for those who don't know, hippo is one of the most deadliest animal.) of course, then I quickly squat down and ask my dad to hide as I think that it will burst through the window and attack us if it knows that we're there.

Then my dad in a squatting position came to me and close the curtains. So we stand up and talk in order to decide a move to do. Then I ask my dad to hide behind the wall as I open the curtains. I was once again shock because the hippo isn't there but now there is a monkey! Golden fur monkey!

As this time the monkey is smaller and seems less harm, I tried to scare it away. Who would have guess the monkey sat there and we are yelling at each other. lol!

So until here my dad in real life waked me up. So the animal world ended. =)

Unstoppable Adrenaline

2010-11-26T00:55:00.002+08:00

I think I've said a quite awesome thing at facebook just now, a friend said nobody knows how he feels, not even his parents. Then I comment and told him, "Don't expect anyone to because no one will ever be you, so consider it as a consequence for being the one in the million.=)"

So, just now we went to Mid Valley to watch some movie. Yee Leng had done some advertisment for Joven so Joven had given her some complimentary movie tickets to whatever movie of our choice. Yee Leng gave us the tickets, in total of 4 free tickets so today's movie is free!

We went to watch Unstoppable. Surprisingly the cinema was almost full! Cause it was out in the cinema for about 2 weeks so I thought that not much people will want to watch it. Anyway, I hate the cold air conditioner. =(

The movie was REALLY NICE! I really recommend you to buy the DVD. It's worth watching it over and over and over. I would rate a 5 star for this.

Unlike some movie, whose climax and anticlimax seems too big of a differences. The whole movie makes you anxious thought out the movie. From the starting till the end. But relax, you won't get an heart attack, it will give you some time to rest. But the movie will make your adrenaline flow through your body for the whole movie!

It doesn't give you the sentimental moments where you get bored soon. No crying over death scenes. Apart from the danger ahead, it still contains some humor, not laughing like hell scene, that is comedy. It still makes you smile while everything is going on.

I think this is the kind of movie that although the ticket is damn expensive but it's still worth it. Watch it if you got the chance to. =)

Cooking... =)

2010-11-24T00:24:00.002+08:00

I'm so craving for a bowl of Maggi curry with eggs, some sausages and a cup of warm Milo. I'm hungry. =)

Speaking of Maggi, it reminds me of cooking breakfast. Last time we bought some frankfurters and since mummy is so scare of cheese, I cooked it myself. =)

Pa always ask me question that I believe no other people will ask if you just came out from the kitchen. He will ask:" Have you off the fire?". He don't mean have I off the main gas, he is literally talking about the fire. Lol.

Anyway, I'l keep on talking about my Maggi. Nobody can cook Maggi my way, not even Mummy! =) I have my own style. With thick and rich soup, drink all of it with the eggs in! But even some of the eggs have "melted" into the soup, yet you can have some because it's not all in the soup!

I personally LOVE light kicap! It's not salty at all. Next time dip your chopstick into your kicap and taste it. Don't just swallow it, taste it. It's Sweet! So my secret recipe, while you're boiling your water pour some in so when you cook the noodles the sweetness will go right through the noodles~~

Omg... I am so HUNGRY!!

P.S.: I think I'm naturally born talented sales person! =D

Nicole's birthday party. =)

2010-11-23T21:16:00.003+08:00

Nicole's party is coming soon. It's on the 27th of November. The plan was actually just a gathering between 3A chinese(not that I'm prejudice, it's just that some food are not halal.) but we had not place to throw a party. So it end up at Nicole's house and on Nicole's birthday! =)

I feel that it's funny because she is the one who is having the party and it's at her house, although I suggested the party but the whole plan changed and it's funny because I am kinda organizing it. I post the event invitation at facebook while the party is at the house.

Maybe that will help her and lessen her work but don't you think this job shouldn't be done by me? =D Anyway, it's ok. It's somehow my fault that she had to give up her house for a evening and need to do all the cleaning up and buying the ingredient and so.

So I'm now helping to make sure of the guest list and try to connivence more people to come and confirm who is coming and who is not. It's wasn't easy, but whatever. =D And I had to make sure who is going by themselves and who is coming with Nicole's mom(she will fetch them from school.). I would really appreciate those who gave me their cooperation. I really don't like people who don't give an exact answer like "I'll try."

So good luck for the event and a really happy birthday to who else? HAPPY BIRTHDAY NICOLE~~ =)

Playing games with myself.

2010-11-23T00:30:00.004+08:00

So just answer whatever the question is ok? (ok!)

Right, here it goes.

1. Do you think that you are cunning? (hmmm... sometimes yes sometimes no....)

2. Do you think that you are smart? (*shy*, yes....)

3. Sugar or salt? (erm, salt...)

4. You trust people more than you trust yourself or you trust yourself more than others? (I think I trust myself more...=))

5. What is on the "irresistible list"? (cookware, yeah I know it's odd, mom's cooking and cold cakes)

6. Have you ever wanted to enter beauty pageant? (Of course! Don't every little girls do?)

7. List 3 favorite activities. ( Cooking, Swimming, Science Experiments)

8. Dislike what kind of personality? (Manipulative, rude, self-centered)

9. What would you do if you found out one of your friends had been bad-mouthing behind your back? ( Well, I'll see. If it is something I think more than gossiping, like attacking me, I would really stop talking to him/her then ask my friends what did she say and confront him/her)

10. Do you think that you are cute? (Honestly yes! Well, it used to be, until some of my friends said something that hurts my feeling)

Well, that all for now. Thanks for staying here and understand me better! I love people who take an effort to understand me. =DDDDDDDDD

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollow(part 1)

2010-11-22T22:42:00.002+08:00

I've watched the famous Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollow. It was good. I wasn't expecting it to be anywhere near nice, but this really surprise me, it is nice.

Unlike the previous Harry Potter movie, this particular one had very clear plot and the story was clear. Although some parts in the movie changed, but it was a continuous story for those who didn't read the book. The previous Harry Potter movies are blur, not connected with the next scene and uninteresting.

So for those who gave up on Harry Potter movies, watch this one. It is much better than those previous ones. =)

Classical Quote from Me!

2010-11-20T00:37:00.003+08:00

I have been "creating" some quote. Some quoted by myself while some by my friends.

Well, there's some! =) Enjoy!!

#1 "讲人不如讲自己~": meaning got mouth say others, don't say yourself!(direct translation), this was created when I was in primary school, standard 1, when my friend accused my another friend for something, then he was also doing the same, so I scolded him with this! =)

#2 "I am Super Wan Tan Me, nothing stops me except for my mummy!": this was in my blog last year. I was feeling enthusiastic, so this suddenly popped into my mind, as it was so rhythmic. =)

#3 "You never know what will happen.": said by me recently to a teacher in front of Nicole and Siew Ying because we were teasing two friends(one boy, one girl, But I seriously forgotten who). Well, seriously you'll never know what will happen*evil laugh*.

#4 "Nice to see, nice to hold, once broken, consider sold. You've broken my heart so I'm yours.": posted on facebook recently. I posted it because I know that lots of people will like it! I'm not really ready to say that. =)

So that's all for now. Remember to come back tomorrow to see what's new on this blog! Bye~~

Life after this.

2010-11-18T02:02:00.002+08:00

I'll start planning my new year resolution now. =)

It might be a little soon but prevention is better than cure isn't it?(I know it has nothing to do with new year resolution but you get me right?) So, lets get it started!!

# 1: Study hard in Biology and aim to be the highest score in the class.

# 2: Make a good impression to teachers who are going to teach me next year.

# 3: Be more helpful(at school or home).

# 4: Be more active in Co-curriculum.

# 5: Involve in the next IU Day.

# 6: Duty without complains.

# 7: Be more friendly to seniors.

# 8: Be more outgoing.

# 9: Organize myself better.( Everyday homework, project dateline etc.)

# 10: Don't break promises. Promise only when you know you can keep it.

That's all for now. We'll see how it goes on 2011. =D

Thoughts

2010-11-18T00:53:00.002+08:00

I'm kinda lifeless nowadays. Everyday sleep, eat, watch tv then online. I guess that's how things go during holiday. Hmmm, what should I do?

I used to plan this and that before PMR but now I simply couldn't see the reason why I should do those things. I like to sit around the house and be a couch potato.

Going out is quite a pain in the ass as I can''t drive and even if I can, I don't have a car. And I live so far from my friends so I can't really ask them to go out with me for just a game like badminton and such. My bicycle is broken(I believe), and I don't really know my neighborhood, so I can't go cycling either.

Piano is simply not my passion, at least not anymore. I only play those few pieces that I already knew, instead of trying new stuff. I don't have the patient and I learn by listening more than reading. So I don't have the confident in myself that I am playing it correctly.

Then should I try baking? But my mom kept complaining each time I bake. She claimed that I leave a mess in the kitchen and left it there for her to clean. Absolutely not! I clean it up, well not a very good job but at least I did. =) But there's more problems, who's going to finish my cake? And how much does the ingredient cost? And which recipe am I going to use? It's too much fuss, I'll do it if I think I had the answers. =)

Hmmm. Should I try writing? My gosh, aren't I writing now? Ya, so I'm writing everyday. That's good right?

Right, now, maybe I should kept some of these "inner voice" to myself. So Bye~~

形容自己

2010-11-16T22:50:00.004+08:00

姐姐讲我用华语的话比较“年轻”，用英文的华老的多，所以我想年轻化，就打华语。几好，人人想老，又老不到，想年轻又年轻不到，我呢，想年轻就年轻，想老就老。

刚才无端端想到这个主题。如果是你的话，你会用什么字来形容自己呢？我刚才想了很久，但是还是想不到一个字来形容我。我不敢把美啊，帅啊之类的字来形容我自己。自己既然跟自己讲:"不要用形容词啦！" 。“傻的，不用形容词怎样形容啦？”。“好啦，不要用浆子的形容词。”

我想看看有哪一个家伙比我更了解我自己，请用一个字来相容我吧，英文也好，话语也好，相容到我就行了。几想有一个人比自己更了解自己。=)

先说一说我对自己的想法吧！

我这个人啊，很记仇。虽然有时忘了，但是想起的时候又会从新生气过;或者是口头上说不生气，不在意或没有生气，在心里终是不开心，最终也是会找人发牢骚。然后慢慢的忘掉，几年后想起才真正放下。

有时会笑个不停，人家看了还以为我傻的，只有我才懂我自己笑什么。不知道上辈子是不是笑佛。但是爱笑不一定是不好的，我幼稚园的时候老师们都很喜欢我，就因为我爱笑！还有人家没有我开心，因为他们不爱笑！所以我很喜欢我自己的这一点。=)

但是我觉得我还蛮“笑里藏刀”的。有时不想让人难过，不开心也讲开心，不喜欢也讲喜欢，然后又跟人家讲是非。有时连好朋友的坏话我也讲的出口的，因为我觉得我讲还是不讲都会不爽，讲了至少好一点，反正我不讲他们，也会有人在我背后讲我，那我就讲咯。

我知道自己的特征也不多，所以再次告退！再见！

3 Amanah

2010-11-15T23:42:00.002+08:00

So, today we had our 3 A jamuan at the school canteen. It was nice. At least we can now joke with the teachers. =)

Anyway, I went there about 9am, supposed to play badminton but end up just sitting there and watching others play while we chat.

Then until it was time, we went to the canteen. Things are just getting ready. So we sat there and chat some more. Almost half of the class came. Some who I didn't saw them for a long time because they didn't come to school after PMR. Happy to see them again.

For the whole day I was grabbing Siew Ying's guitar around the school because I love it! I wasn't good at this, I had to admit. After some time(after everything ended), I finally catch the fingering and everything. But now my finger hurts like hell. I wonder is it certain that we must sacrifice our beautiful finger to learn string instruments?

So in the end of the day, I was happy but some things did bothered me. I've accidentally step on someone's tail while that someone step on mine too.

Pets

2010-11-15T00:30:00.005+08:00

My family are not allowed to have a pet, especially those with furs, like dogs and cats. But last time my sister and her boyfriend bought some fishes and decided that they wanted to put the aquarium in one of our bedroom.

I don't really like fishes then. They are simply boring. I was wishing(still wishing)that we could have a dog instead. But after sometime, I got attached to them.

It was first two Rainbow Shark(some sort of goldfish), but then my sister found that they were too "hyper", meaning that they love to jump! Our aquarium didn't have a cover so after one of the two fish "flew" out of the tank and die and we decided to bring the other one back to the aquarium. But when the fish is still in the bucket, waiting to go back, it "flew" out and no one noticed and it died, too. (Actually I don't really remember two of them died or just one, maybe the first fish didn't died)

So my sister went back to the aquarium and bought some more fish! Actually she went back twice. So in the end we got 6 yuppies, 4 lilies, 3 "vacuum cleaner" and 2 angel fishes. I love them! My sister named the yuppies do, re, mi, fa, so, la(not very creative isn't it?), then the 4 lilies I've forgotten their names but I called them this lily, that lily. The others my sister didn't name them. But I did gave the 2 angel fish a name! One got a little more gold on its scales while another got more silver, so the one with more gold I named it Goldy while the other Silvery!

Anyway, one of the yuppy were pregnant, so it was really aggressive and it kept attacking the others. To be honest, I really hate that fish! Lol. Anyway, almost all but the yuppies died because of stress, and we had to bring it back to the aquarium again.

Here is some story while I was keeping them.

When there were two lilies left, they looked so bloated and one didn't even had the energy to keep itself upright. Then we isolated them in a bucket, then Cheng and I was hoping whole night that they will make it through the night. We were amazed by the act of the fishes! The red lily was letting the blue lily to lie on it! You can't really picture our feelings, but it was very touching, really.

We were so happy on the next day to find not only that they were alive, but they looked better and the blue lily can swim on its own! They are now back into their own world, I really wished that they are alive and healthy now.

The next story. When Silvery died, Goldy was also dying. We too, isolated Goldy in the same bucket, but to find that it was so miserable. It was swimming in circle, in hope that it could "stand" up straight but it can't. We went out for lunch and when we are back, we found nothing but a dead Goldy lying on the bottom of the bucket. I had to say, it was really sad to see each of our beloved fishes died. Someone who didn't experienced it don't know how it feels.

My advise is don't keep pets when you are not prepared or more exact, well-prepared, don't buy them first. Wait till you're ready, because what you'll loss is other's life. =)

华文版 =）

2010-11-14T01:33:00.004+08:00

昨晚心血来潮想打一篇华文版的部落格。其实华文版的部落格也不错，只是打的时候有一点麻烦。

我忽然想唱一首歌，红蜻蜓。因为我很喜欢一个华文小说的作者，他的名字叫徐友彬。他有一个出版公司，叫着红蜻蜓出版社。大概每个小学的图书馆都有它的书。他写比较多都是儿童故事，但是他的小说也写得很好。他的idea很新，还有他写的书时候大多数都是把自己写成书中的我，而书中的我通常都是十几岁的孩子，而他又可以写到真的好象那个岁的孩子，高难度！

现在我除了它的书，其他的华文书我都几乎不看了。其实从小学开始我都是这样，没什么出奇的。看来我是他从小的粉丝咯。他现在出版了十本小说，我都买齐了。不要问我为什么，我以上已讲了，想知道就自己读吧！

我超级喜欢读一些会让我眼眶含泪的故事（其实可以弄我哭的故事很多。), 而徐友彬的书就是有着这样的魅力。昨晚才读了“青色的围墙”，读到哭了。几爽一下。

但是说真的，如果要我每一本书的故事都讲给你听的话，我看我讲到你都不要听了还可以讲。

好啦，现在我就已经讲完了，我们下次再见吧！但是下一篇不会再是华文版了，因为我呀，打字打到本来想打什么都不记得了！

Education gone loose!

2010-11-13T01:43:00.004+08:00

Finally inspiration found its way back to me. Lets move on my buddy!

I remembered the time when I was in primary school. I was pure then. I didn't know anything about the so call "love". I first get contact with these stuff was when the hormone started which was standard 6, when one of my friend told me some of the guys in my class first started wooing her when all of us are in standard 1! That was like omg!! The things I remember when I was in standard 1 was complaining about the sweaty hands of my friend and racing to finish the homework!

This is one of the problem nowadays. Kids now like to think that they are "in love" when they "love" another person every month! And they are getting contact with these things to soon and leave to slow. Don't know what I mean? It's ok, I'll explain. That means kids are thinking too much about "love" with they are still in fact, Children! Example, imagine your mom and dad's generation, they were helping their family and had none single thought of "love", kids now are watching tv and wondering when will the main characters kiss. And when I mean leaving to slow meaning, people in the last generations know so fast that dating are more towards finding the right person for this life, while boys and girls these days kept dating for fun! I wonder what's so fun... I always see people "crying" on facebook about these stuff. Such a difference, right?!

Then next point is, the one that most secondary school students think that it's nothing and it will soon spread to primary school which is bad words! I remember that first four letter words I knew was, F***. I was in standard 5 then and I don't know what it means until standard 6. Boys and girls in secondary school, especially those in kebangsaan school include bad words in their daily conversation, and in almost every sentences! Some people might say that they wanted to stop badly but can't seems to resist. Rubbish! You can control yourself as good as you can control your pee! You can stop yourself from peeing in front of your friends then why can't you stop yourself from saying bad words!

Bad words are impolite. But even though so secondary school students seems to forget about the moral values we learn in kindergarden( the secondary school's moral class had no effect on us, we are just memorizing definitions.). People know that it's rude yet they speak foul languages! What had happened to the world...

Anyway, it's just what I think about this generation and kids these days. I wonder how would they really feel if their children(in the future)heard them saying bad words when they "can't" control themselves and their children saying them too like it's so cool and funny.

When inspiration can't find me...

2010-11-13T01:05:00.002+08:00

These few days I can't seems to find any inspiration or topic for my blog. I must update because I secretly(now it's not anymore) wanted to post 30 post for this month, so average 1 post per day. So I can't afford to skip postings anymore.

I don't know what to say actually. Perhaps good luck to those who will be having their SPM starting on 23th of November? Ya, really, good luck you guys! =)

Something a little bit funny maybe? Yesterday night, 3A friends were chatting among each other at MSN. So as no one was watching, I changed my name into Siew Ying's. Then I type something. Then when Siew Ying come back into the chat room and she was so scared because she didn't type those. Then she went to bed.

I felt a bit funny. The first thing that I would consider is someone in the chat room playing a prank. She thought that was some ghost's job! XD

Hmmm, until my dear friend, Inspiration found me, stay tuned for the next post y'all! =)

Planning succeed!

2010-11-11T00:35:00.003+08:00

Today's badminton plan was rather smooth! Except for the fact that Kean Jhun and Eric didn't go to school and it made me so worry that they are not coming. But in the end they came! I was so grateful!

But eventually one plane did took off. Well, it's ok. At least she told me. Anyway, thanks for the shuttlecock. Although we found a lot more there.

Well, things went on quite well. Although at first Eric kept smashing. Then somehow in the end Eric was like giving me and Nicole training, kept hitting the shuttlecock to me and let me hit. I really thank him for this.

Kean Jhun too. They are really gentleman today! XD haha...

So my plan did worked~ I feel like giving myself a big hug and say to myself Good Job! =DDDDDDDD

"Explore Race"

2010-11-11T00:00:00.004+08:00

Today(or should I say yesterday, it's 12.30am now.), we went to school but don't know what to expect from those counselors. Turns out our activity for today is "Explore Race".

We were randomly put into 10 groups. I was in group 5 but someone in Ika's group wanted to change group with me so I did it. So the only one I know in my group is Ika. There was another two Malay boys who are quite noisy but I like the fact that they are in my group, so entertaining ...

So group 8 set out for our adventures! First we went to the place where we had our assembly, where we failed to do the task(none of the groups managed to complete it)then some of us had to eat a bun with chili and salt sandwiched in between. Because another two girls(including Ika XD) refused to move so I( I don't eat spicy and I hate chilis!!)had to eat it. I kept asking Azfar(check point checker) to put more salt in mine. I am so proud that I finish the Chili Bun!!

Then we lost another few more games, costing one of our shoe( but we abandoned both and our socks, lol..), sand waters being wiped on our face, then flour water on top of it then eggs( which smells awful!) and the most ugly punishment( but I am not scared nor embarrassed ) was plugging a tissue in one of our nostril( I saw everyone with one in there nose!).

In the end I don't really know who got the first because our team got to the last check point person while another went straight back to the gym, so... Well, who cares? Anyway, we all ended up sweaty, smelly and fairly happy(not to mention "floury").

It was an exhausting day for those who came and lucky for those who didn't. At least it's enjoyable instead of miserable. =)